Drug Abuse on the Rise Among Boomers

Boomers Getting Stoned. Boomers who "turned on, tuned in and dropped out" in the seventies are now feuling the rise in drug use among 50-59 year olds.

By Gary Geyer

The Facts:

The government reported that 4.4 percent of baby boomers, ages 50 to 59 admitted to using illicit drugs in the past month. Is this a good percentage or one we should worry about?

This number has steadily increased over the past 3 years for the 50+ age group, according to the records of the National Survey on Drug Use and Health.

Surprisingly, it has been exactly the opposite for young teens: illicit drug use for that age group went down for the third consecutive year.

The annual survey provides an important look at how many Americans drink, smoke and use drugs such as marijuana, cocaine and methamphetamine.

Back to the garden

The peak of drug use among youth in the United States occurred in the late 1970s. The so-called “Woodstock Generation” getting older. It appears now that the “kids” bought the weed with them into the new century. Baby boomers who learned to "turn on, tune in, drop out" as teenagers are fueling a rise in illicit drug use among 50- to 59-year-olds.

Marijuana: Still the drug of choice

Drug use by baby boomers increased from 2.7 percent in 2002 to 4.4 percent last year and climbing. Marijuana was by far their drug of choice, accounting for 70% of the boomers illegal drug use. In more than half of those cases, the drugs were provided free from a friend or a relative. Only 4.3 percent reported buying the drug from a drug dealer or some other contact.

There’s further proof of drug abuse among boomers: A growing number of them are showing up for drug abuse treatment. And if that weren’t enough, the median age of overdose deaths is also moving up.

Just saying ‘No’

The ironic part is that a growing number of the children and grandchildren of boomers are not into drugs at all.



Research shows that baby boomers are still carrying with them their

"far out" attitudes from the 60's and 70's. As a result, the National Survey on Drug Use and Health found that their rates of use were significantly higher compared to the declines among today's teens who are rejecting drug use at higher rates.



Analyzing consequences



The Scripps Howard News Service followed up this trend with a well-researched analysis regarding the consequences of outdated baby boomer attitudes about illegal drug use:



"As America's baby boomers approach senior status, a troubling number are dying from causes that have marked the generation since the 1960s - drug abuse, suicide and accidents.”

An analysis of death records for more than 304,000 boomers who died in 2003 shows the legacies of early and lingering drug use, a tendency toward depression at all stages of life and a stubborn determination not to "act their age."

The study goes on to say that boomers accounted for about half of all people nationwide who died of drug-related causes in 2003. That is far out of proportion to their 26 percent share of the population. Those numbers do not include impaired driving or other accidental causes indirectly related to drug use.

A “Talking Head” has his say

*Dr. Dan Blazer, a Duke University professor of psychiatry, believes he has a “handle” on the problem and asserts: “Since adolescence, they’ve been drinking and using drugs more that previous generations. They’re less likely to have strong religious beliefs, more isolated, twice the divorce rate of the generation before them, and still facing money and work issues they though would be behind them in their 60s.”

The article’s overarching conclusion resides in the headline: “Boomer Doom: Falling Victim to the Culture of Youth.”



*Boomer Blogger Brent Green comments:

There you have it: Boomers were lackadaisical, live-for-today hippies in the sixties; it makes perfect sense that their longstanding self-destructive behaviors would be killing them today.



My point is that there is a longstanding tendency to use the myths and realities of the sixties to cast a uniquely dark and accusatory shadow over the Boomer generation.

The Scripps report, while insightful and helpful on some levels, further perpetuates in its implications the idea that accelerating Boomer mortality is due to inherent and idiosyncratic generational weaknesses. Thus, we’re dying in droves because of drug abuse and perpetuation of our iconoclastic youth culture.

I'm suggesting that we keep these findings in perspective and not be too quick to let selective statistics, subjectively interpreted, stand unchallenged as another covert indictment of the generation and its character. <<


*Excerpted from Brent Green’s Boomer Blog: http://boomers.typepad.com/boomers

Why Would an older man want a younger woman?

Being Gay or Lesbian and Past 50

"A small roundtable discussion between “Let Life In” (www.LetLifeIn.com) and five gay and lesbian people between 52 and 68 years old."

Being Gay or Lesbian and Past 50


Once upon a time there wasn’t a gay rights movement. Gays and lesbians were harassed by the police and ridiculed by most everyone else. Many kept their homosexuality a secret.

That was only thirty five years ago, in 1969, (the same year as Woodstock), gay activists took a stand at the Stonewall Inn in New York City and the gay rights movement began.

Most of the people who were there from the beginning, if they are still alive today, are certainly 50+, and many of them are seniors.

Thank heaven attitudes have changed. Or have they?

The following is a small roundtable discussion between “Let Life In” (www.LetLifeIn.com) and five gay and lesbian people between 52 and 68 years old. Sometimes serious and sometimes fun, we covered several areas—every thing from health care to…sex.

LetLifeIn.com: You are all gay and past 50. What’s on your minds these days?

Edward: Well, just like just about everyone in the 50+ age group -- gay or straight-- gay and lesbian seniors are concerned about their health. I don’t mean to start us off on a down note -- I don’t know about the rest of you, but the thought of relying on others for health care is very frightening to me because I know we have to turn to networks and social institutions that have not always been tolerant of us.

Ruth: I know what you mean. Gays and lesbians in general, I don’t care what your age is, still encounter negative reactions from health providers. It is especially difficult for we seniors who grew up prior to gay liberation and still remember “the bad old days.”

Ellen: In much of America and Canada, there is still overt discrimination by both the medical profession and the public in general. When we’re looking for health care, we come up against a lot of obstacles.

George: Many gay and lesbian seniors revert back to the closet-- keeping their sexual orientation hidden. Even if we are openly gay in our personal lives, I know many people who withheld that information when they needed health care.

LetLifeIn.com: I can understand that, how else is it different?

Larry: It’s much easier for heterosexual seniors. They usually can rely on their biological family as their support network. That’s not the case for gay and lesbian seniors.

Ellen: You know it. The ironic part is that gay and lesbian seniors usually have larger social networks than straight seniors yet these networks are not recognized by the so called health care professionals.

George: Also, same sex partners don’t have the same rights as family members when it comes to care-giving and even hospital visits. You know if a decision has to be made involving your partner, or even a friend, that decision is invariably given to the biological family rather than to us. As far as they’re concerned, we don’t even exist.

LetLifeIn.com: How do gay and lesbian seniors fit in with the rest of society?

Larry: It depends on where you live, what kind of job you have…

George: how rich you are.

[Laughter]

Larry: The degree to which gays and lesbians are “out” can vary. Older homosexuals are far less secure about their sexuality than those who are younger. It wasn’t as if the doors swung open and all of us danced out.

[Laughter]

Ellen: The youth-oriented culture that is often associated with gay and lesbian communities can have the unfortunate effect of isolating seniors.

Ruth: Often, closeted seniors live alone or with partners without any additional support. I know many of us feel that younger gays and lesbians who are in their 40s and 50s, you know, just a little behind us, should reach out and take on more responsibility.

LetLifeIn.com: Okay, Let’s talk about sexuality.

Ellen: Ah, lest we forget, sexuality, Sexuality, you know, is an important part of homosexuality.

[Laughter]

Ruth: The aging process brings with it special sexual problems for gays and lesbians. It’s not so easy, you know.

Edward: Unfortunately, the (male) gay community presents a particular image as the standard of attractiveness.—young and perfectly buff. If you happen to be getting on in years and still have an active libido, you are too often put down as a “troll” or a “dirty old man.”

Larry: You rang?

[Laughter]

Edward: Seriously, there is nothing wrong with being horny when you’re 20. I speak from experience. Likewise, there is nothing wrong with being horny at 50, 60, 70 or 80 either.

Ellen: Many seniors are in long term relationships. Others are out there looking.

George: We may not all be Brad Pitt, but there is nothing wrong with Sean Connery.

Larry: It’s a matter of physical fitness and a good attitude.

Ellen: Yeah! Self-acceptance is sexy.

LetLifeIn.com: It sounds like you’re saying getting old is a mixed blessing?

Edward: There may be downsides to getting old but there are plenty of rewards. I think gays and straights would agree that older lovers are more…adept.

[Laughter].

Edward: Seriously, maturing enables people to grow into their sexuality. They become more accepting, more understanding, and more willing to explore.

George: Listen, there is no denying, that in a community that puts physical attractiveness as the number one value, aging can be rough. Some who are younger, I feel, resent those they perceive to be old. Seniors are a reminder of immortality—proof that no one stays young and unwrinkled forever.

Ellen: Let’s hear it for Botox!

[Laughter]

Larry: On the other hand, some gays who are older disrespect the young ones --maybe resenting [in a somewhat haughty manner] “the unlimited horizons that was once theirs.”

50plusMag: So in the end, what really counts?

Ruth: I think we probably all agree that sex can be enjoyable at any age and that sexual energy and a beautiful body is great. But what really counts in sex is when you connect— to others and to yourself. And that only happens with “emotional generosity,” I read that once.

George: But then again, as Shakespeare once said, “Father Time is a hunk.” <<


For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Cosmetic Surgery for Boomer Men. Why not?

As Newsweek noted a few months ago, baby boomers are turning 50 in droves.Maybe we are just looking in the mirror more, but suddenly we’re noticing things we didn’t notice a few years back. You know, wrinkles, frown lines, crow’s feet, droopy eyelids, baldness and double chins. “That couldn’t possibly be me,” you think. “Why do I look so old and tired?”So what’s a feller to do?Well, for one thing, more and more men in our age group are having cosmetic surgery to help them look younger and attractive. Like women, they have discovered the benefits of cosmetic surgery – both personally and professionally. Of course diet and exercise are still the most important factors when it comes to good health. But more and more, plastic surgery is moving into the mainstream of life for men over 50.Popular, routine, and affordable.The fact is, plastic surgery has become more popular, routine, and affordable. The stigma of vanity seems to be gone. People aren't afraid to admit that they're considering the idea. Hey, we don't even call it a nose job a "nose job" any more. How's that for stigma reduction?At the officeOne company CEO we know says that his decision to have a facelift was part business, part personal. Today, there are a growing number of mature business men who are concerned with not just looking more attractive but being more competitive on the job. Unfortunately, youth still rules.Let’s face it -- society still puts a premium on youth. 50-year-old executives are often competing with guys who are 20 years younger. The perception is that a 30-year-old is willing to work harder, and for lots less money. (Could it be true?)The big question.Many boomer men have voiced this thought: What’s the use of spending a lot of time at the gym and watching yout diet if you stll wind up with a tired face? No doubt about it -- baggy eyelids and a tired looking appearance affect perception of the ability to perform on the job. In the business world the feeling is if you look tired or don’t take care of yourself, you won’t keep up.On the home front.It’s not just busy business executives in fear of losing their jobs that are responsible for the boom in cosmetic surgery. Men are feeling they want to keep pace with their (younger-looking) wives. It’s only natural to think, “Now that I have a young-looking wife I better take a look at myself.”Easing into it.Men usually start out slower than women. They may start by going to hair salons instead of barber shops, having facials and other skin toning treatments, and shopping at cosmetic counters.Skin Care For MenIt is not uncommon at all for men to use moisturizers and sunscreens. Shaving can be a problem for some men whose skin can become irritated and rough. New exfoliating products and soothing creams help to reduce wrinkles and keep the skin looking younger.Taking the plunge.The logical next steps are non-surgical cosmetic procedures. That includes Botox injections, laser hair removal, microdermabrasion, chemical peels, collagen injections and laser resurfacing.Laser resurfacing. One of the newer and more popular procedures today is lasrer resurfacing. It’s specialties are leathery, sun-damaged skin and wrinkles.ZAP!The laser, also used to zap unwanted body hair and acne scars, is a major advance in the boomer man’s war against wrinkles. Its precise, controlled light beam allows surgeons to target specific areas of the face--usually around the eyes and mouth--or treat the entire face.The laser doesn't replace a facelift because it doesn't dramatically reverse sagging. However, its effect on skin surface is remarkable. Leathery, crinkly skin can become smooth as a 20 year old’s.Men seem to want what women want.Like women, men over 50 want trimmer waists and fewer wrinkles. And they want more hair on their heads. (Hair transplants top the list of the most common procedures.) We’ve come a long way, baby.Many men are now rejuvenating their faces with face, neck and eye lifts and forehead and brow lifts. They are having lasers and peels to remove the wrinkles and make their skin look younger. Some are re-sculpting their noses and undergoing liposuction, tummy tucks and even breast reductions (gynecomastia).You ain’t heard nothin’ yet!The new non-ablative lasers and tissue tightening devices such as Thermage, offer mini-lifts without surgery. Add to that new fillers such as Restylane and Perlane that now give men more choices to remove lines and wrinkles and fill in deep creases and folds.Bye-bye double chins, spare tires and love handles. The Vaser, a new liposuction procedure, eliminates double chins, spare tires, love handles and even beer bellies. The Liposuction process.Because liposuction removes localized fat that doesn’t respond to diet and exercise, it is one of the best procedures to help men attain the body shape they want. When working out isn’t enough.Many men who are over 50 work out and take care of their health but find they still have extra fat around the mid-section or back. Because liposuction removes localized fat that doesn’t respond to diet and exercise, it is one of the best procedures to help men in those areas.The “Endo” brow-lift.The endoscopic brow lift is a fairly new, minimal-incision technique that removes deep vertical lines between the brows. (Scowlers, take note.} Surgeons use an endoscope, a narrow instrument hooked up to a video monitor, and do the entire operation through several tiny slits near the scalp line.Small incisions mean faster recovery time, less hair loss, less nerve damage, and smaller scars. (The scars are so minimal that even balding men can have the surgery.) It’s amazing. Who would’ve thought the upper third part of the face contributes so much to appearance.Chests, calves, buttocks, thighs, arms and abdomens.Boomer Men are also having pectoral implants to increase the size of their chests and calf implants (I’m embarrassed to write this) for more shapely legs.Body contouring to lift the buttocks, thigh, arms and abdomen help to reshape the body and remove excess, hanging skin. This procedure is especially useful after weight loss of 50 to 100 pounds or more, and is becoming more common.Before you decide to do anything…Read up on the procedure you are interested in and find out if it's really right for you. Get the details on what will happen before, during and after surgery. How long is the recovery time? What are the medical risks and aftereffects?If you have questions (and you SHOULD} call the American Society of Plastic and Reconstructive Surgeons (ASPRS) which represents 97 percent of all physicians certified by the American Board of Plastic Surgery. Their Plastic Surgery Information Hotline is: 1-800-635-0635. You'll get reading material and a referral to resources in or near where you live.

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Are Our Best Sexual Years Behind Us?

Over 50, over the hill.

You're tired, you're bored. You don't look or feel as good as you did when you were thirty. Neither does your partner.
Great sex is just in your dreams.

It's unfortunate, but that's what many of us past 50 think.

Bah, Humbug!

I'm here to tell you, at your age you should know better.
And, as my grandson would say, "Get over it!"

You know where sexual feeling starts? In your head.

Before you can have enjoyable, satisfying sex, you have to change your way if thinking. You have to stop believing that all those things mentioned above matter.

The fact is you are still capable of feeling pleasure. You are still capable of having feelings of physical love and desire for your partner.

50 plus Ain't What it Used To Be.

Look around. 50 (and over) isn't what it used to be. Sting, Harrison Ford, Jeff Bridges. Goldie Hawn, Cybil Shepard, Tina Turner. Need I go on?

I'm sure I don't have to tell you this -- baby boomers have changed everything. We are the generation that refuses to "act our age."

Here Are The Facts.

The quality of our sex after 50 is different. Not worse -- different. Yes, our sexual responses change from what they were when we were younger.

Men

For example, a man seldom gets an erection simply by viewing his partner. That doesn't mean he isn't aroused or interested. After 35 or 40, a man needs direct stimulation of the penis to get an erection. Once he understands this he can learn to appreciate the slower build-up of sexual tension and enjoy a wider range of sensations -not just in the penis, but the whole body. He enters a new phase of his sexual development. He is now more able to experience the pleasures of giving satisfaction not just receiving it.

If a man is healthy physically, there is no reason why he can't continue to have erections and enjoy sex into old age.

Women

Many women fear that menopause means the end of their sex life.
It's actually just the opposite.

Women report that instead of experiencing declining sexual desire as they anticipated, their desire increases following menopause.

The shift in a woman's hormonal balance increases her libido and the ability to have orgasms. In fact, a woman's ability to have multiple orgasms is not affected by her age and her orgasms are often more intense.

In addition, many women past 50 find they can be more assertive than they were in their thirties. And many men find that a turn-on.

Don't Let Your Head Get in The Way.

Emotional maturity and self confidence of both men and women in their fifties allows for a more intimate relationship, sustainable for many years to come

And lest we forget at any age, the physical and psychological benefits of sex are numerous-everything from reducing stress to easing of depression.

Here's to your health!

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Cher: Refusing to Turn Back Time

At this point in Cher’s life, is there anybody alive who hasn’t read or heard everything there is about her and formed an opinion?

We’ll see.

On who she is

”I spend half my time trying to let people know who I am, and the other half trying to hide myself from people.”

“People think that because you're a bit flamboyant, you are not serious, or that you aren't pensive, or that you don't have strong opinions. I have opinions that I don't think I could ever voice until I got old enough not to give a s--- what people think.”

“I'm not sure that I have the guts to actually be as outspoken as I'd like to be. Underneath, I think I'm still really a radical. And I think that '60s thing doesn't exactly go away.”

On being called a “diva”

“That comes from you, the journalists. How did I get that reputation? Because I am so not the diva. And every time someone asks me what a diva is, I say that it's someone who thinks they are superior and is demanding all the time, for no reason.”

”I don't care what anyone calls me. It doesn't make a difference to me but that is just not who I am.”

On having “some work done”

"Yes, I have had a facelift, but who hasn't? I have become the plastic surgery poster girl. I asked my 90-year-old grandmother what she wanted for her 90th birthday and she wanted collagen in her lips!”

“Everyone says I am terrified of getting old but the truth is that in my job becoming old and becoming extinct are one and the same thing."

On Sonny

“We used to fight all the time and it didn't make any real difference. We never fought when we were married, that's the strange thing… I just always gave in. But, afterwards, we would fight, but, ya know, it didn't make any difference.”

"We had the strangest relationship. When were in court he had tried to sue me and have Chastity taken away from me and he said I was an unfit mother, and then he lost and as we were coming out of the court he grabbed me and kissed me. If it had been anyone else but him I probably would have punched them, but because we had such a strange relationship, I just started to laugh."

“I have dreams about him, ya know? It's, like, really weird – he just kinda hangs around.”

On younger men

”As I got older, men my age weren't interested in me. It’s like they didn't want to be caught dead with a woman my age. They're on their third family, and they always go for the 25-year-old girl. Once I turned 40, it was the younger guys who were attracted to me.”

On looking for a relationship

”You know, you don't look for that. You stumble over it. You fall
into it, but you don't go looking for relationships. They either happen or they don't.”

On children

”I couldn’t imagine never being a mother. I think that my life would have been empty without them.”

On her dry spell acting career

“When you get to a certain age you just don’t get many offers until you get much older. There is a big spot where it’s a long dry spell.”

“I’m in no man’s land, literally, because men are the people who make the choices in this business. I’m not their fantasy. When they are in their 50’s and 60’s, it’s their fantasy to be with someone young.”

On depression in the family

”It's absolutely in every one of us. It's in my grandmother, my mother, my children. I call it the gift-curse that you just deal with. Sometimes you deal with it well and sometimes you deal with it badly.”

”They still don't know enough about it, as far as I'm concerned. In my mother's time they knew nothing about it; my poor grandmother, she suffered a lot. I think as the generations go down, they do find out more information. But still, it's not like you can go get a blood test or MRI. It's all guesswork; it's definitely not a science.”

“It's something that I am making peace with -- no, I'm not making peace, because you don't make peace with it. You learn how to live with it. You either flow with it or it breaks you.”

“There are things that you give up for it and there are other things that you get that make you very artistic and sensitive. As negative as it could be with my mother's moods, the positive things were so positive. My mother would encourage me about being special and being gifted.”

“My mother was the most creative, fantastic person and would come up with great things to do. She'd buy art supplies and all of us would sit around painting. I was lucky. But then she would be really depressed and have a hard time coming out of her room. See, when you're young, it all seems normal to you.”

On aging

“When I turned 40, I just thought, 'You know what? Age is just bypassing me…then 45, and I'm thinking, 'I still look good.' Then 47 comes, and I'm running on the treadmill…I'm starting to notice it, little backache, little neck ache, get that lipstick perfect. It's a lot more output for less gain.”

On what advice she gives to herself

“Just to keep going every day, to continue being excited, fresh, interested and not just focus on yourself -- you know, try to divide your time between doing stuff for yourself and family and charity. It takes a lot of time.”


For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.letlifein.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Online Dating: Pros and Cons for those 50+

There are about 1,000 dating web sites. Probably, more than that. Online dating makes up 1% of all Internet usage. That means that one out of every 100 people logging on visits an online dating site.

Many of us who are 50+ find that being part of the online dating process -- getting out there and doing something for ourselves -- is positive and empowering whether or not the matches are successful.

In any event, like everything else in life, it has its pros and cons. Here are the ones most frequently mentioned:

Pros

1. There are a lot of people out there to choose from.
Remember high school? Remember college? Remember all those girls and guys there and the tremendous number of possibilities? Well, not since then will you find that many potential dates (and mates) in one place.

It’s also comforting to know that you are not alone—that there are many single people your age out there who are looking for the same things you are. Companionship and perhaps love.

A word of advice: Meet as many people as you can. A mistake many 50+ people make is thinking that meeting two or three people in a month, all of whom they don't like, is a good reason to stop. There is someone out there. Don’t give up.

The mainstream sites allow you to search for singles in specific age ranges and geographic locations, but there are also plenty of sites catering to singles who share an ethnic background, a hobby or a sports interest.

2. It won’t cost you an arm and a leg to participate.
Look at it this way –it’s cheaper than going on a senior cruise to (maybe) meet someone. Also, drinks at a singles bar aren’t cheap. Besides if you are past 50, it’s not as easy to “hang out” like you perhaps did in your younger days.

Although you can find free chat rooms and sites that run personal ads, you are probably better off paying a small fee to a legitimate online dating site to meet people who are more serious about meeting you. Most sites have a sign-up fee of about $25 to $50 as well as a monthly fee.

3. Personal Profiles can say a lot.
Most sites require you to write a personal profile. If written with thought, profiles are an excellent way to describe what a potential date is like. Include hobbies, movies, political beliefs, dreams, goals and favorite activities.

Spend time thinking about what you think someone else would like to read about you. Try to make it fun, funny, wry, whatever you think reflects your personality. Then bounce it off a few friends- ideally of the same gender that you hope to attract - to read through it critically and help you identify what's sounds cool and what sounds corny.

Profiles are most often what makes one decide if there is enough in common to make a connection.

Something to note: If you read a profile that someone has posted that is short and it seems apparent that the person writing it put no thought into it, you can expect that kind of communication in real life.

4. It’s easy to connect with someone without feeling awkward.
Say goodbye to the awkwardness that usually occurs on first dates. By exchanging email you get to know each other slowly and relaxed. If you decide to meet, you’ll already know a lot about each other, and that will help you both feel more comfortable.

Con

1. Free is not always good. Beware, there are some strange people out there.
Some sites allow people to post their profiles and respond to others for free. Unfortunately these free sites often attract some strange people. It’s important to check out the site carefully before you join.

For example, here’s one reader’s experience: “One guy resembled the Incredible Hulk while another said he preferred educated women who would spend their lives serving him. Then there was this fellow who ordered one steak to split while dining at a fancy restaurant. He then informed me that sex was expected at the end of the night because an erectile dysfunction drug had been ingested.”
---Name withheld

2. It may cost more than you think.
Many sites will allow you to view other people’s profiles before joining so you get an idea of who’s available. But some may charge to let you reply to a profile, and here’s where you need to be careful.

Check out the membership dues and rules before you join, especially if you provide a credit card number. Make sure you know exactly how much it will cost, when you’re signing up for an automatic renewal that will be charged to your credit card, and what you will need to do to quit the site when you’re ready.

3. Pictures sometimes aren’t honest.
Photos are often an important component of online profiles. Unfortunately, some people post photos that were taken many years ago, when they looked much younger. Often the photos are extremely flattering and not very true-to-life.

Here’s a good rule of thumb: If you remember that he or she probably won’t look as good as his or her photo, you won’t be disappointed.

4. People can lie, too.
No, really? I’m afraid so. In an effort to get more responses, or in some cases, to deliberately mislead, some people lie in their profiles. Don’t believe everything you read—if he or she sounds too good to be true, he or she probably is. <<

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Joe Pesci: A Life of Surprises

Has anybody seen Joe Pesci lately?
He's around but believe it or not, he hasn't made a movie in over 5 years.

Here's the scoop!

Joe has recently said," I've given my whole life to show business. I'd like to find out about another part of life, a more relaxing and spiritual part and a more enjoyable part."

Martin Scorsese: A Spiritual Leader

Joe, speaking of Scorsese has said, "In my eyes, he is a great spiritual leader. Even though many people think that Martin, Bob (DeNiro) and I are ambassadors of violence, I can assure you, we detest it as much as everyone else. But, under Martin's watchful and meticulous eyes, he tries to show how terrible and violent life can be. If you never see the evil man can do, you will never long for the goodness."

You should see Martin on the set when he's talking about any subject. He's so inspirational. Sometimes there are actors and crew members sitting on the floor around him like a flock listening to the shepherd. I've never seen film crews more eager to work and please "the Master".

"For me, Martin has awakened my spiritual side to unbelievable heights. We talk for hours about life, death and spirituality. I can't say enough about how much I love and respect him. Honest to God."

Joe's famous scene

Joe has been referred to as consummate character actor. He has appeared in 3 films directed by Scorsese (Raging Bull, Goodfellas
and Casino). He won an Academy award for Goodfellas as probably the all-time menacing crazy mobster. His famous rant is a classic, and is often repeated in bars across the country when guys have had one too many.

I'm funny how?

Here it is. Try it on your friends.

"What do ya mean, funny? Let me understand this cause, I don't know maybe its me, I'm a little f...... up maybe, but I'm funny how? I mean, funny like I'm a clown, I amuse you? I make you laugh........? I'm here to f....'amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?

Joe holds the world's record and dubious distinction of saying the "f" word about 120 times in Goodfellas.

Backtracking

Joe was born February 9, 1943 in Newark, New Jersey. He started his career in radio as a child actor at the age of four. When he was 10, he was a regular on the TV variety show, Star Time Kids.

Little Joe sure can sing

Joe's acting career hit a lull in his teenage years. In his early 20's, however, he began a musical career under the name of Joe Ritchie. He had an LP called, Little Joe Sure Can Sing

Let's twist

I can't picture this either, but, remember Joey Dee and the Starliters of Peppermint Lounge fame? Joe was their guitar player.

Not counting Let's Twist, a 1961 film he appeared in, Joe made only film, The Death Collector, in 1975. It went virtually unnoticed and Joe decided to give up his acting career, what there was of it.

He returned to New York and ran an Italian restaurant.

"I couldn't get any jobs, and when that happens you get so humble its disgusting. I didn't feel like a man anymore........ I felt really creepy. I was bumping into walls saying, 'Excuse Me'."

"My daughter is the one really great thing that came out of my early life. I'm a good father now. I wish I'd been a good one back then.

The Death Collector as career move

One of the few people who saw Death Collector, was Robert DeNiro. He was impressed by Pesci's performance and brought the film to the attention of Scorsese.

Scorsese cast Pesci as Jake LaMotta's brother in arguably the best film of the Eighties, Raging Bull. The performance earned Pesci an Academy Award nomination as Best Supporting Actor.

The rest, as they say, is history.

Joe has made 24 films. Among them are the 3 Scorsese films mentioned above, Lethal Weapon 1, 2, 3 and 4, Home Alone 1 and 2, My Cousin Vinny, JFK, and Once Upon a Time in America.
To purchase Joe's movies, click here.

Filmography:

Lethal Weapon 4 (1998)
Gone Fishin (1997)
8 Heads in a Duffel Bag (1996)
Casino (1995)
Jimmy Hollywood (1994)
With Honors (1994)
Home Alone 2: Lost in New York (1992)
Lethal Weapon 3 (1992)
My Cousin Vinny (1992)
The Public Eye (1992)
Ruby's Dream (1992)
JFK (1991)
The Super (1991)
Betsy's Wedding ( 1990)
Goodfellas (1990)
Home Alone (1990)
Lethal Weapon 2 (1989)
Man on Fire (1987)
Once Upon a Time in America (1984)
Easy Money (1983)
I'm Dancing as Fast as I Can (1982)
Eureka! (1981)
Raging Bull (1980)
Family Enforcer (aka The Death Collector) (1976)

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Aging (and Living) with Friends

"It’s fun having company and just plain smart to pool resources. All we want is to safeguard our quality of life, our independence and our pride.”

Some women are choosing to spend their later years living with their women friends. It could be a sensible alternative to retirement homes.

It’s not sweeping the nation just yet, but the idea is gaining momentum. Sociologists and demographers have noted the growing interest of baby boomer and senior women to team up and face their retirement years together.

The Golden Girls had the right idea.

Heterosexual women who are either single, divorced or widowed are pooling their resources, buying homes together, splitting the chores, buying long term health care insurance --all while enjoying each others friendship and sharing each other’s lives.

A wake-up call.

It is not uncommon for these women to have witnessed their own aging parents having to be dependent on children or paid caregivers.

In many ways it has been a “wake-up” call for them.

(In 1940, only 13% of people over 60 had a living parent. In 2000, 44% did.)

They say this is not the kind of life they want for their later years. The friends-helping-friends living arrangement could very well the answer.

Planning ahead.

Women on the average live seven years longer than men. Although thinking about it is not what they’d like, many women expect to be widows. Planning ahead is not a bad idea.

So what else is new?

Women have had experiences with living in sorority houses and college dorms. They have shared apartments after graduation and have traveled together. Many have been there for each other during divorces, deaths of parents and family emergencies. The closeness is there. There doesn’t seem to be anything unusual about the taking the logical next step.

Health related issues.

Besides the companionship, the reason most mentioned is to be there for each other for health related issues. Taking care of each other during illnesses, not to mention everyday aches and pains is a very compelling reason to consider this kind of living arrangement.

Is it the same for men?

For the most part men in this age group expect that their wives will take care of them should they get ill. Most men over 60 are not used to the caregiver role themselves. One woman voiced what others were thinking. “My husband wasn’t there to change the children’s diapers. It’s hard to imagine him having to take care of me.”

Many women say they would sooner trust their friends to be good caretakers.

Make-it-up as you go along.

Since this phenomenon is relatively new there doesn’t seem to be a right way or a wrong way of going about it. It’s kind of ‘make-it-up as you go along.’ Some have considered an arrangement similar to a pre-nuptial agreement that would make clear rights and responsibilities.

Things to consider.

And then there are inheritance issues to be considered.

There are many legalities that have to be worked out so that it doesn’t become sticky later on.

If they buy a house together, contractual matters need to be discussed and made clear.

Health-wise, it’s easy to say they will take care of each other during flu season but what about severe Alzheimer’s?

New territory.

No doubt about it, we are exploring new territory. But as we all know, things are changing rapidly and we all must consider what “family” really means today. We can’t be stuck in our parent’s way of looking at things. We have to be open to new ideas. Some aren’t as radical as one might think.

As one woman put it, “Let’s face it. It’s fun having company and just plain smart to pool resources. All we want is to safeguard our quality of life, our independence and our pride.” <<

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Dustin Hoffman: True Confessions

Dustin Hoffman was born August 8, 1937. He was a slow starter.

As a young man, Dustin attended Los Angeles High School. He described himself as “unpopular, unattractive, shortest kid in class, and kind of a misfit.”

He wasn’t a jock, and never hung out with the guys. “I never felt an identity growing up but I didn’t know that I didn’t feel an identity. I just didn’t feel right. When I started taking acting classes there was a connection.”

“Looking back on it now”, he adds, “I only knew who I was when I was being someone else.”

The “rewards” of success.

After the success of The Graduate, in 1967, Dustin confessed he went on a sex binge.

He admitted that he was addicted to having sex in public places, like the Studio 54 club in New York, and says he also enjoyed threesomes. "I met a couple of girls in bed more than once.”

He described those years as "the candy-store years because there were drugs, stardom, the Pill.”

Dustin also confessed that he tried cocaine - but had to stop because he was allergic to it.

He said: "I couldn't breathe for weeks afterwards."

First sexual experience.

Dustin revealed how he lost his virginity to an older woman who had mistaken him for his brother. .

His first sexual experience was cut short when the woman – who was 20 and was five years older than Dustin - realized “in horror” that she was not making love to his older brother, Ronny.

"I jumped off her, stark naked, and left the room.

I wound up in the living room, and guys were sitting around having beer and talking, and I was naked.

This may have been the beginning of my acting career without my knowing it, because they stood up and applauded - and I liked the applause."

Condom talk.

“My oldest son, Jake, who is twenty-three, loves to tell this story about our condom talk.

I had lectured in a UCLA class on a Saturday and when I left there was a biology class in session next door. On the door was a carton of free condoms, and I stole it. Actually, I said to the instructor, since I’m not getting paid for the lecture can I have this instead? He said, ‘Sure, take ’em.’ And I took off.

I came home, went to Jake’s bedroom where he was lying on his bed talking on the phone. He said, ‘Hey Dad, what’s up?’ I just walked over and spilled all of them on his head—hundreds of condoms!”

Spirit and life force.

“I am a sexual being and I dispute the way society views sex. I think they compartmentalize it. Sex has to do with spirit and life force.”

“Whether you’re gay, bisexual, or straight—I don’t care what combos you want to put in there—sex is a good thing. And God bless everybody, and may they come off the charts any which way they can! Just protect yourself,” (referring to condoms)

Risk equals excitement.

Dustin explains, “In terms of sex, I think there’s always been a correlation between sex and danger. Before HIV there was the risk of getting a girl pregnant and playing that game was a part of the excitement, especially during the teen years.”

He continued, “I don’t think that has subsided in today’s world. It’s the same with smoking and drinking. There’s a danger. It’s a flaw in the human makeup. We take on that which scares the shit out of us.”

Now for something really kinky.

Dustin says his lucky socks are one of his cherished possessions. “I have different pairs, some have question marks, and some have nutty faces. They’re funny. I found them in Paris, and they are my Achilles’ Socks. If I need good luck, or fly in an airplane, I wear my lucky socks.”

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Being Sting: A Tough Job but Somebody’s Got to do it.

Showbiz: “He's a multimillionaire rock super-star with one of the happiest marriages in the business. Plus, he's super-dad to six children. But is he happy?"

Sting was born in 1951. Before he was Sting he was Gordon Sumner. His father was a milkman and his mother a hairdresser. When “Gordie” was eight he was up at 4 AM delivering pints of milk with his father.

Sting described his parents as being reserved and uncommunicative. Mealtime conversation was limited to "Pass the salt." Love, he says, was “guessed at rather than expressed.”

Goodbye Gordon, hello Sting


Sting left home when he was 19 and became a teacher. He was given the name ‘Sting’ because of the bee-like quality of a black and yellow sweater he used to wear when he played in jazz bands at nights and weekends.

"My father never could call me Sting -- he never quite understood what I became. He had aspirations for me that I never realized -- he wanted me to work in a bank.”

Writing as therapy

Sting claims that writing his recent book, Broken Music: a Memoir, was very therapeutic for him because it gave him a chance to go back over everything and write it down. Sting said that he found that writing about his life at the age of 50 enabled him to be grateful for his parents, love them and tell their story proudly. “I wouldn't have been able to do that if I was younger - I needed to be a certain age and have the perspective and life wisdom that it brings," he said.

“I'm still in touch with my parents in a psychological way. In situations where something wonderful happens to you, they are still there as part of my consciousness. It makes my current life seem even more extraordinary.”

Personal songs

Many of Sting's own biggest hits have been songs written at periods of emotional turmoil - the break-up of his first marriage, the death of both his parents within a year of each other. He has spoken in the past about his need to channel emotion – “Disguise it as pop music,” he has said. “Melancholy is not a bad thing.”

Advice to young musicians

"I tell them you probably won't make it," he says. "But that the spiritual journey you go through to become a musician is a soul-nourishing job. The chances of becoming rich and famous are slim, but that's not important. What's important is doing the job and working at it for your own sake."

Speaking of pop music…

As a father he says (somewhat ironically), that he is suspicious of the role of pop music in today's culture. "Pop is basically about sex. It sells sex to children who have no ability to understand it.”

Speaking of sex… what about all that talk about Tantric sex?

Despite the rumors, Sting claims that he and his wife Trudie do not engage in sessions of Tantric sex. He says that he doesn't even know what the phrase means and that the story came about as a result of being misquoted at a party.

Hallucinogenic drugs

He does, however admit to taking hallucinogenic drugs. Sting was offered an herbal tea to put him into a spiritual trance while campaigning for the protection of the Brazilian rainforest and living with the Brazilian Indians.


"It's a substance they've used for thousands of years," he says. "You drink a cup of this horrible liquid. The first time I took it I had an hour of mortal terror and then a good hour crying for everything in my life - relationships I'd had with my parents, my family, my wives, my girlfriends and my children. That's when I first decided to write about my life."

Success, wealth and housing (X7)

Sting is one of the world’s most successful musicians but won’t discuss either his success or how rich he is. He does not mind people knowing that he owns seven homes - two in London, one in Los Angeles and one in New York; Then, there’s a 20-room 600 acre estate in Tuscany, his family's main 60 acre residence in Wiltshire and a house in the Lake District (England).

He says that he uses all of his houses and that it is important for him to have them. He explains it this way: "I spent a quarter of a century living out of a suitcase traveling through hotels on tour. It's far nicer if you can go back to your own home instead with a few books that are yours, some art on the walls that you bought and sit on your own furniture.”

No sign of a mid-life crisis

Although Sting is 54 years old, he says he doesn’t believe he is at the so called middle-aged ‘mid-life crisis’ stage just yet. He says, “I feel like I'm as curious as I was when I was 14.” He adds, “I've got as much energy.”

Living normal

He was quoted as saying, "I want to live as normally as possible and I demand my right to walk around in a normal way, without protection or bodyguards. I go out and get the newspapers in the morning, I walk the dogs and I demand respect from people on the street. Not as Sting, but as a guy who's got the same right to be there as anyone else in the community. I'm a citizen, if you like, and I have citizen's rights."

Being 54

Sting is extremely fit from many of hours of yoga each week. He probably looks better now than he ever has. He has some grey streaks in his short (and thinning) hair but that's the only sign of his age.

Now, an apparently perfect life

Life now for Sting is apparently perfect - he combines being a rock super-star with being a multimillionaire super-dad to six children. He seems to be enjoying what has been called, one of the happiest marriages in show business.

(God knows where he finds his 'melancholy' these days.)

“I am happier in my skin than when I was 22.” I’m not just saying that,

I really am.” <<

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

We Are No Longer Boomers. We Are YAPS.

To refresh your memory, a third of the US population ---76 million of us– were born between 1946 and 1964. We were the “baby boomers.”

Boomers had monumental effect on virtually every American institution throughout their lives such as media, education, politics and consumerism.

We were a force to be reckoned with.

What about now? Are we still a force to be reckoned with?

Yes, I think so. But the tag “baby boomer” is meaningless to us. Today the term seems archaic. It described who we were then, not who we are now.

Who are we, we baby boomers and what are we like today?

Our ages today are about 50—65, give or take a few years on both ends. Not yet seniors, we are pre-seniors. (The terms “pre-senior” and “senior” or “senior citizen” can often be a state of mind and need not coincide with a person’s actual numerical age. How one perceives oneself is the key).

So, here's what I propose: From now on, start calling us by a term we can identify with. Are you ready? We are YAPS. Y-A-P-S. Youthful, Active, Pre-Seniors. (You can call us "Yappies", if you like.)

What YAPS are like:

YAPS are youthful in appearance and attitude. We try to stay active. We exercise, watch our diet and eat healthier than those Gen X-ers half our age. As the NY Times has pointed out, the average age of the 5 directors nominated for Academy Awards this year is 60. Clint Eastwood, the winner, is 71.

We still listen to rock ‘n roll (classic rock, not rap or hip-hop), are fashion conscious, get nipped and tucked when need be and have romantic inclinations.

YAPS lead active sex lives and are Viagra’s prime market. We are prominent in the work force, are politically motivated, surf and shop the internet, play video games (really), take vacations, frequent restaurants, travel, buy luxury items (more than any other demographic) such as plasma TVs, new cars, boats and houses.. We help provide for our children, spoil our grandchildren, and today more than ever, take care of our aging parents.

YAPS are a demographic.

The YAPS demographic is growing faster than you can shake a stick.

When you consider that every 7 seconds someone turns 50, that means the “YAPPIE” population increases every 7 seconds. The mind boggles at our numbers and the power we can (still) yield.

Sadly, we are a virtually untapped market. So marketers, wake up and start tapping. We are tired of being ignored. YAPS will spend upward of three trillion dollars in 2005 on anything and everything that prolongs our (forgive me) yappiness.

We do NOT roll over and play dead once we turn 50. We are still that “narcissistic, self indulgent group” we were when we were baby boomers, and we still believe the world owes us a living. We are alive and kicking, and don’t you forget it

Fitting into pop-culture

We think the time is right for our segment of the population to be recognized, appreciated and have our very own pop designation.

There were hippies, yippies, and yuppies.
2005 is definitely the year of the YAPS!

Long live the ‘Yappies!’

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit http://www.letlifein.com/. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Keith Richards: Satisfaction, Guaranteed

Answer: Keith Richards and Cockroaches.
Question: Name 2 things that would survive a nuclear war.

It's an old joke but hey, Keith Richards is a survivor. He is known as the man with 5 strings and 9 lives. Keith has been arrested at least 10 times; his reputation is that of a chain-smoker, hard drinker, drug using rock superstar. He's been a Rolling Stone for 40 years. The man takes a licking and keeps on ticking.

Early Keith

Keith Richards was born in Dartford, Kent on December 18, 1943.
He grew up in the London suburbs.
You might say he was a rock and roller from practically the beginning. (I say practically because believe it or not, he started singing as a choir boy and had an "angelic voice".) Elvis, Buddy Holly and Chuck Berry were his heroes during his teen years. He was also a fan of American Blues singing, especially Muddy Waters and Willie Dixon.

He got his first guitar when he was 15 and he says at that moment it became the most important thing in his life. He teamed up with an old mate from his sandbox years "a kid named Mick Jagger" and played small clubs and pubs around London. They found a few other guys and formed a band. One of them, Brian Jones, suggested they call themselves The Rolling Stones (after an old Muddy Waters song, Rolling Stones Blues).

The rest is history

At first they did covers of songs others wrote. When they found they were good at writing songs themselves, they were on their way. Their lyrics were about sex and drugs and that soon made them the talk of London, to say the least. That, combined with Keith's edgy guitar style, gave the band a sound like no one had heard before. They became the "bad boys" of rock and roll. They were considered "raunchy, crude and irreverent". While parents were merely shocked by the Beatles, they were repulsed by the Rolling Stones. The Beatles, after all, only wanted to hold your hand. The "Stones" wanted to (God protect us) spend the night together.

To make things worse, their behavior off stage became as notorious as their on-stage performances. Mick and Keith became tabloid darlings. Keith, in particular, became the poster boy for the drug abuses of the 70's and 80's. Keith has been quoted as saying,"I never had a problem with drugs, only with cops." Keith's drug and alcohol abuse however, didn't hurt his rock and roll image one bit.



Famous Keith stories

Keith's reputation became bigger than life. Real stories and rumors spread like wildfire. (You don't become a rock and roll legend for nothing.) It's been said that half the stories about Keith aren't true. The frightening part is half of them are.

Here's but a sampling:

Dr. Dracula

Everyone "knew" someone who swore it was true. Keith, in order to cure his heroin drug addiction, traveled to Switzerland for a blood transfusion. He stayed at the chalet of a famous physician who had developed a method to replace all of the patient's "addicted" blood with "good clean blood".

Then there is what's known as "the famous pissing incident".

After being denied the use of a men's room at a gas station, Keith, Mick and Bill Wyman proceeded to urinate on the wall, thus pissing off the owner, who filed charges. They were arrested for "insulting behavior".

Who could ever forget "the fur rug" bust?

The police raided Keith's house and found amphetamine tablet's in Marianne Faithful's coat. (Marianne was Mick's girlfriend at the time) They also found resin and ash of (possibly) marijuana. The police said that Marianne was wearing "nothing but a fur rug." The tabloids went wild. Keith was charged with "allowing on his premises" and given a one year sentence and fined 500 pounds. His conviction was appealed and overturned, the evidence being too circumstantial.

And of course, there was the "saved by the blind woman" story.

Keith was busted for heroin possession in Toronto. He would have gone to jail (most likely) had not for the pleas of a young blind woman who told the court how Keith had gotten her home safely after a Stones' concert. A plea bargain was worked out that included a benefit show for the Canadian National Institute for the Blind.

The "Don't do drugs, kids," public service announcement got a few laughs.

Keith was asked to do a public service announcement urging the kids of the world to stay off drugs. The joke going around was that the kids of the world couldn't do any more drugs because Keith had already done them all.

Probably the best story yet had to do with Satisfaction.

One night in 1965, Keith awoke some time in the night with a song in his head. He turned on his tape recorder, grabbed his guitar, and banged out the opening riff of (I Can't Get No) Satisfaction, and went back to sleep. In the morning he listened to the tape. He said, "It was 2 minutes of 'Satisfaction' and 40 minutes of me snoring." (Newsweek Magazine called the song's 5 chord progression, "five notes that shook the world.")



His Life.

Through everything, Keith has maintained a self-effacing, slightly bemused outlook.

"To me, the main thing about living on this planet is to know who the hell you are and to be real about it. That's the reason I'm still alive.""I've lived my life my own way, and I'm here because I've taken the trouble to find out who I am."To his credit, Keith doesn't recommend that anyone live life as he has. He says he owes his so-called indestructible quality to sturdy stock. "I come from very tough stock and things that would kill other people don't kill me."

That's nice.
Who do you know that's alive and kicking? A friend. A relative. A famous person you'd like to know. Write and let us know about them. We'd love to share the story with our readers.

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Jack Nicholson: Handling the Truth

When Jack was 37, in 1974, he found out something that changed his life: the woman he thought was his sister was actually his mother.

Jack’s “sister” June was 17 and a dancer and showgirl with the famous Earl Carroll Dancers. She had an affair with a 27 year old man and got pregnant. The man was not yet divorced from his first wife so he couldn’t marry her. (However, he paid off some officials, committed bigamy and married her anyway, thereby saving her from what was at that time, shame and humiliation).

June's mother, Ethel, was understandably upset and took matters into her own hands. June was sent to her cousin's in New York where she would carry and give birth. ( Jack was born in April of 1937 in St. Vincent’s hospital, in New York City. There is, however, no record of his birth anywhere.)

She then returned to Neptune New Jersey where they lived and it was agreed that Ethel, Jack’s grandmother would raise the child as her own. No one would know.

So Jack was raised by his grandmother, thinking she was his mother and that his actual mother was his older sister. Whoever knew, kept the secret.

The truth hit him hard.

By the time Jack found out, both his mother and grandmother had died. [June died of cancer in 1963 at age 44.]

Jack had virtually no contact with his birth father. He did call his father once, reportedly beginning the conversation with a terse "Hello. I understand you're family", but he did not allow the relationship to go any further. [His birth father also died of cancer, in 1997.]

Jack, the actor.

Jack got his training as an actor with a group called the Players Ring Theatre. He found jobs onstage and on TV - in shows such as Bronco, Hawaiian Eye, and Tales Of Wells Fargo.

Sex, violence, horror and action.

Jack’s first big break came in 1968 when director Roger Corman cast him as the lead in his low-budget film, The Cry-Baby Killer.

Since Corman often shot his films back-to-back on the same set, Jack hung around and was cast in a series of Corman films notable for their sex, violence, horror and action.

Drugs

Jack smokes incessantly and went through an intense drug period, including the use of LSD. He said he gave that up after waking one morning in a tree.

Jack, however continued to use other drugs and became very interested in internal counsciousness and the counter-culture.

He wrote the script for Corman's LSD extravaganza, The Trip, and put together The Monkees' “weird-out,” film, Head.

One thing led to another.

In The Trip, a TV director decides to score some acid and explore his mind. Peter Fonda played the director and Dennis Hopper played the dealer.

Peter and Dennis were working on their own project in 1969, called Easy Rider. When Rip Torn backed out of his role at the last minute, they asked Jack to replace him as the spirit-soaked southern lawyer.

Easy Rider got Jack an Oscar nomination and made him a star.

Jack has been nominated for an Oscar eleven times and won it three times -- as Best Actor for One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest in 1975 and As Good As It Gets in 1998. He also won an Oscar as Best Supporting Actor for Terms of Endearment in 1982.

In 1994, Jack was given the American Film Institute's Life Achievement Award.

Money, money,money!

Jack’s movies have made over $1.25 billion at the box-office. The number that is quoted most is the $60 million he received from his share of the 1989 film, Batman.

(In his Oscar acceptance speech for One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, Jack thanked Mary Pickford "for being the first actor to get a percentage of her pictures.” Jack learned quick.)

Smug and sexist

Jack Nicholson has been described as “smug and sexist to the core.” He has had a reputation as a womanizer since his salacious role in the Mike Nichol’s film, Carnal Knowledge. And the racy sex scenes with Jessica Lange in The Postman Always Rings Twice did not hurt his reputation one bit.

His many affairs.

After an early marriage to Sandra Knight, 1962-'67, Jack had a 17-year relationship with Anjelica Huston. When she left him, he began seeing Rebecca Broussard. (He had two children with Rebecca -- Lorraine and Raymond. Jack also has a son, Caleb whom he had with actress Susan Anspach, in 1970).

Jack had been involved secretly with actress Lara Flynn Boyle, who was 30 years younger than him. She has said that being with Jack was like “being with a King -- talented, experienced, charismatic, fabulously well connected and unbelievably rich.” Who could argue with that?

Then there was Christine Sheehan, an ex-prostitute who claimed she went to Jack’s Hollywood home in 1996. She said when she asked for the money for her services, Jack banged her head repeatedly on the floor. She settled out-of-court for $33,000. Later, she claimed her injuries had worsened and asked for another half a million. This time, Jack contested. Jack has made love to women 26 years younger than himself on screen and 33 years younger than himself off screen.

And then there’s basketball.

Every basketball fan knows that Jack is a Los Angeles Lakers super-fan and never misses a home game. Rumor has it that the shooting schedules of his films have to be arranged around the Lakers' home schedule.

Moon over Boston.

Jack’s (in)famous basketball story happened during the 1984 NBA playoffs between the Los Angeles Lakers and the Boston Celtics at Boston Garden. Jack was in a private box and began teasing the Boston fans. He put his hand round his throat, suggesting that Boston was about to choke.

Well, it seems that the Celtics took the lead and held it. With the clock running down and Jack’s Lakers about to lose, Jack gave the Boston fans his editorial comment: He dropped his pants and mooned them.

You’ve come a long way, Jack.

The guy who started out playing creeps in Roger Corman B movies now sits in the front row at the Academy Awards. No need to say “Nicholson” any more. Just “Jack” will do fine.

My favorite Jack lines:

Jack Torrance (The Shining):
"He-e-e-e-re's Johnny!"

Colonel Nathan Jessup (A Few Good Men):
"You can't handle the truth."

Daryl Van Horne (The Witches of Eastwick):
"Do you think God knew what he was doing when he created woman?"

Melvin Udall (As Good As It Gets):
"You make me want to be a better man."

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Howie & Gary At Woodstock

The year was 1969... Howie and I felt old
We had gone to Woodstock as adults, not hippie kids. We had planned for the concert weeks in advance; we had tickets and a place to stay. When we drove there on Friday afternoon the traffic was backed up forever. We got as close as we could to the concert area. We parked the car behind a church about two or three miles away. (In the Woodstock movie there's a helicopter shot and I swear I can see the car.)

We joined the crowd hiking towards the concert area. We passed some kids swimming in their underwear and wondered if we could ever do such a thing right where everyone could see.

A free concert
As it turned out, we didn't need our concert tickets at all. The gates had been torn down. I don't think I ever saw so many people in one place in my life. I was a little disappointed that we were sitting so far from the stage. I wanted better "seats". That first night we strained to see Melanie, Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Joan Baez. Joan said something about her pacifist husband who was in jail, and the crowd cheered.

And the rains came
We sat in the drizzle for quite some time. When the rain started coming down harder, a huge 30-ft long plastic tarp unfolded on top of our heads. Someone either planned for the rain or swiped it from somewhere. About a hundred of us sat underneath it, holding the tarp up with our hands.

A revelation
Joints started being passed around. They were coming from all directions. The combination of the rain sounds on the plastic, the humidity under it, and the smell of the grass, was something I never experienced before or since. For the first time, I felt I belonged with these people. They were a nice bunch of young people, not just hippie freaks. (Could it have been the grass?)

That night we hiked back in the rain and found our rented room. We slept nice and dry for about six hours.

So, where's the food?
We awoke to a bright sunny day. There were thousands of kids milling around town looking for something to eat. We hadn't eaten since lunch the previous day. We joined up with this guy, Tommy, who knew the area. He told us of an orthodox Jewish summer camp that wasn't too far. We waded into the camp around the edge of a lake. We were met suspiciously by the director of the camp. He offered to feed us a kosher meal if we would eat it outside the camp infirmary, away from the children.

Afterward, we headed back in the blazing sun, towards the concert.

The truth exposed!
It was then that we came upon it. Oh my God! In a muddy lake about a hundred young people, male and female, stood around, swam, and frolicked, naked. It may have been just good, clean, healthy fun, but to me it was incredibly sexy. You just don't get to see that many naked people in one place that often. I had my camera and I started snapping away like crazy.

Liberation
After watching for about 10 minutes, to our surprise, we said, "Why not?" and joined them. Nobody knew us, so we took off our clothes. I took a picture of Howie naked and he took a picture of me.

I have to tell you, we got into it. I really liked these kids. There is something about public nudity that obviously brings out the best in people.

Back to the garden
We eventually continued our trek and made it to the concert again. In broad daylight, it was breathtaking. A sea of people. We estimated (wrongly) that there must have been about 3 million people there. I honestly don't remember much about the music that day. Just being there was amazing enough. We heard reports of drug overdoses and riots but we saw none of that.

That evening we paid $15 for a pizza in town. In 1969, that was ridiculous. We were totally exhilarated but wiped. We decided to go home to New York City that night, instead of staying through the next day. By driving back early, we beat the traffic.

I got my pictures developed right away. Howie and I had a great time looking at them. We could hardly wait 'til the movie opened. We saw it together opening day.

Epilogue
Twenty years later, in 1989, I sold a picture I had taken of Howie with some of the other bathers to Life Magazine for $500. They ran it in their 20th anniversary of Woodstock issue. He got a full page and I got a photo credit. Good Morning America saw the photo and flew Howie to New York (from California) to be on the show and tell the world how it was. He became our generation's representative. I had to brief him the night before; he admitted not remembering much. I guess that's good.

Somebody once said if you remember the sixties, you probably weren't there

If you care to buy videos and books about Woodstock, they are available from Amazon.com and Barnes & Noble.com.

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.