Why Would an older man want a younger woman?

Sugar Daddies and the Women Who Love Them

The dictionary describes a Sugar Daddy as a wealthy older man who gives a young person expensive gifts in return for companionship or intimacy. In the 30’s, sugar daddies were a staple in movie comedies and musicals. Today, thanks to the internet, they are more sought after than ever. If you have an opinion on this topic please let us know
What follows are excerpts from a web forum whose participants are older wealthy men and younger women who are looking for them.
“I happen to want something more than a straight swap of money for sex. I am looking for a young girl to have as a lover and a friend, someone who will help me feel young while I ease her financial burden and show her the good life. A straight money exchange implies the person might not even like you... what's the allure of that?”
“For myself, this is how I see my role as a sugar daddy. I am not looking for an arrangement to meet once or twice a month. I have been very successful in my career and I am looking for someone to share the good times with me. To me that means helping a special woman out there in her daily life so that she can have the freedom to enjoy life with me and not have to worry about the everyday problems of having to support herself.”
“I think we all have to be honest and admit we are all here for a reason no matter how you sugarcoat it. We all have different thoughts yes. Some men act like women should be jumping for them because they claim to have money. Some girls may jump. If I have a daddy he will be well taken care of out of respect and desire not money. Money is a bonus.”
“I know what I want and that is to meet a gentlemen who will give me allowances, take me shopping, etc. In return I will be the hot female on his arm, among other things. I'm looking for help financially, but not a relationship. Well maybe, if it's right.”
“I figured it would be easy to find a nice gentlemen who wanted a beautiful lady to spoil BUT I come to find out there's only ONE way to get spoiled HAVE SEX WITH THESE MEN OR NO SPOILING.”
“The type of man I want to be with is able to take care of me. Women are biologically attracted to men with money, just like men are biologically attracted to a small waist and full lips. It's facts of life.”
“I'm only looking for adventure and sure sex is part of adventure as well as communication, honesty and trust. I do let any gentlemen know in advance that I expect to receive perks, gratuity, and benefits for my time and companionship.”
“.....perks, gratuities, and benefits for your time and companionship"???????? lol I hate to sound insulting, but I think this is where the line is crossed. You are wanting to get paid for services rendered...I'm sorry but this sounds too much like a business deal (prostitution).”
“For me personally, I refuse to feel treated like a transaction. Foremost, I am a woman. I want someone who will spoil me and become an asset in my life because they care about me. Now don't misunderstand me, I am not asking for someone's hand in marriage, but sex without emotion TO ME equivocates prostitution... a transaction.”
“Some view it as a straight business arrangement and if that's what makes both of them happy, then great! However, that's not exactly for me. I actually have a brain, so I'd like to be treated as more than just arm candy. Just like I'm sure the guy has a personality and feelings, so he'd like to be treated as more than just an ATM. That's just my two cents!”
“My ideas differ from most I guess. I like the idea of here and there weekends somewhere, sharing my time and fun with a beautiful young lady. I pay all expenses and then some and she enjoys a great time with me. It's what it is...but it works! No expectations other than a good time. I just don’t have time for "feelings" and such that are the result of a normal relationship. But I am fun and nice and have had NO complaints!”
I am looking for something I have been missing for a long time...excitement, fun, flirtation, as well as a little "love.” In return, I will help this lady with things she must get...rent, car payment, allowance, etc... This is reality, not the movies. I really don't think I am going to find some Cover girl, who will fall in love with me, and ladies, if you are looking for Richard Gere in "Pretty Woman", I think you are going to be disappointed. If we realize, that we are real people in search of something, I think we will all do alright. I hope so anyway.”

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Cosmetic Surgery for Boomer Men. Why not?

As Newsweek noted a few months ago, baby boomers are turning 50 in droves.Maybe we are just looking in the mirror more, but suddenly we’re noticing things we didn’t notice a few years back. You know, wrinkles, frown lines, crow’s feet, droopy eyelids, baldness and double chins. “That couldn’t possibly be me,” you think. “Why do I look so old and tired?”So what’s a feller to do?Well, for one thing, more and more men in our age group are having cosmetic surgery to help them look younger and attractive. Like women, they have discovered the benefits of cosmetic surgery – both personally and professionally. Of course diet and exercise are still the most important factors when it comes to good health. But more and more, plastic surgery is moving into the mainstream of life for men over 50.Popular, routine, and affordable.The fact is, plastic surgery has become more popular, routine, and affordable. The stigma of vanity seems to be gone. People aren't afraid to admit that they're considering the idea. Hey, we don't even call it a nose job a "nose job" any more. How's that for stigma reduction?At the officeOne company CEO we know says that his decision to have a facelift was part business, part personal. Today, there are a growing number of mature business men who are concerned with not just looking more attractive but being more competitive on the job. Unfortunately, youth still rules.Let’s face it -- society still puts a premium on youth. 50-year-old executives are often competing with guys who are 20 years younger. The perception is that a 30-year-old is willing to work harder, and for lots less money. (Could it be true?)The big question.Many boomer men have voiced this thought: What’s the use of spending a lot of time at the gym and watching yout diet if you stll wind up with a tired face? No doubt about it -- baggy eyelids and a tired looking appearance affect perception of the ability to perform on the job. In the business world the feeling is if you look tired or don’t take care of yourself, you won’t keep up.On the home front.It’s not just busy business executives in fear of losing their jobs that are responsible for the boom in cosmetic surgery. Men are feeling they want to keep pace with their (younger-looking) wives. It’s only natural to think, “Now that I have a young-looking wife I better take a look at myself.”Easing into it.Men usually start out slower than women. They may start by going to hair salons instead of barber shops, having facials and other skin toning treatments, and shopping at cosmetic counters.Skin Care For MenIt is not uncommon at all for men to use moisturizers and sunscreens. Shaving can be a problem for some men whose skin can become irritated and rough. New exfoliating products and soothing creams help to reduce wrinkles and keep the skin looking younger.Taking the plunge.The logical next steps are non-surgical cosmetic procedures. That includes Botox injections, laser hair removal, microdermabrasion, chemical peels, collagen injections and laser resurfacing.Laser resurfacing. One of the newer and more popular procedures today is lasrer resurfacing. It’s specialties are leathery, sun-damaged skin and wrinkles.ZAP!The laser, also used to zap unwanted body hair and acne scars, is a major advance in the boomer man’s war against wrinkles. Its precise, controlled light beam allows surgeons to target specific areas of the face--usually around the eyes and mouth--or treat the entire face.The laser doesn't replace a facelift because it doesn't dramatically reverse sagging. However, its effect on skin surface is remarkable. Leathery, crinkly skin can become smooth as a 20 year old’s.Men seem to want what women want.Like women, men over 50 want trimmer waists and fewer wrinkles. And they want more hair on their heads. (Hair transplants top the list of the most common procedures.) We’ve come a long way, baby.Many men are now rejuvenating their faces with face, neck and eye lifts and forehead and brow lifts. They are having lasers and peels to remove the wrinkles and make their skin look younger. Some are re-sculpting their noses and undergoing liposuction, tummy tucks and even breast reductions (gynecomastia).You ain’t heard nothin’ yet!The new non-ablative lasers and tissue tightening devices such as Thermage, offer mini-lifts without surgery. Add to that new fillers such as Restylane and Perlane that now give men more choices to remove lines and wrinkles and fill in deep creases and folds.Bye-bye double chins, spare tires and love handles. The Vaser, a new liposuction procedure, eliminates double chins, spare tires, love handles and even beer bellies. The Liposuction process.Because liposuction removes localized fat that doesn’t respond to diet and exercise, it is one of the best procedures to help men attain the body shape they want. When working out isn’t enough.Many men who are over 50 work out and take care of their health but find they still have extra fat around the mid-section or back. Because liposuction removes localized fat that doesn’t respond to diet and exercise, it is one of the best procedures to help men in those areas.The “Endo” brow-lift.The endoscopic brow lift is a fairly new, minimal-incision technique that removes deep vertical lines between the brows. (Scowlers, take note.} Surgeons use an endoscope, a narrow instrument hooked up to a video monitor, and do the entire operation through several tiny slits near the scalp line.Small incisions mean faster recovery time, less hair loss, less nerve damage, and smaller scars. (The scars are so minimal that even balding men can have the surgery.) It’s amazing. Who would’ve thought the upper third part of the face contributes so much to appearance.Chests, calves, buttocks, thighs, arms and abdomens.Boomer Men are also having pectoral implants to increase the size of their chests and calf implants (I’m embarrassed to write this) for more shapely legs.Body contouring to lift the buttocks, thigh, arms and abdomen help to reshape the body and remove excess, hanging skin. This procedure is especially useful after weight loss of 50 to 100 pounds or more, and is becoming more common.Before you decide to do anything…Read up on the procedure you are interested in and find out if it's really right for you. Get the details on what will happen before, during and after surgery. How long is the recovery time? What are the medical risks and aftereffects?If you have questions (and you SHOULD} call the American Society of Plastic and Reconstructive Surgeons (ASPRS) which represents 97 percent of all physicians certified by the American Board of Plastic Surgery. Their Plastic Surgery Information Hotline is: 1-800-635-0635. You'll get reading material and a referral to resources in or near where you live.

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Sexual Secrets of a Gigolo

"Jeremy (not his real name) is a professional paid “escort,” a Gigolo. His specialty is older women. Jeremy is 38 years old. His “clients," between 50 and 70."

www.LetLifeIn.com Interview by Gary Geyer

LetLifeIn: Welcome Jeremy. Thank you for meeting with me.

Jeremy: It’s my pleasure.

LetLifeIn: Jeremy, all your clients are past 50 and you are just 38. Is that just a coincidence?

Jeremy: No, No. I’m actually attracted to mature women. I find them easier to talk to and be with. And I must admit, the fact that they are attracted to me is great for my ego.

LetLifeIn: Jeremy, I don’t know how to ask this question tactfully. You use the term “gigolo.” Aren’t you really a male prostitute?

Jeremy: No. Not at all. And don’t worry -- I’m not offended. A prostitute is generally for sex only. Slam bam, you know. A gigolo is, I’m speaking for myself, someone who is very much concerned with giving his client pleasure. Sexual pleasure, yes—but also understanding her as a woman --- her wishes, her desires; what she likes and what she doesn’t.

Her agenda becomes my agenda. I think of myself as someone who represents the best in men in both character and sexual skill. I always conduct myself in a way so that I bring credit to myself and pleasure to my clients.

LetLifeIn: What makes you good at what you do?

Jeremy: Well, that’s a good question. How much time have you got?

LetLifeIn: Plenty. Go on –don’t worry.

Jeremy: I think the most important thing is that I am attentive. I pay attention to what the woman I’m with is saying as well as what her body language is saying. I think sometimes the body language is far more honest than the words.

LetLifeIn: What else?

Jeremy: I compliment her often. I make her feel special. It’s always about her. Never about me. I’m not the kind of guy who struts around drawing the attention. I make sure she gets it.

LetLifeIn: I don’t know, Jeremy. You look like a pretty spiffy guy.

Jeremy: I believe I should present myself well. I dress nicely – never in jeans, my nails are clean and manicured. I speak softly, but confidently. I’m always a gentlemen, although in the bedroom I am sometimes asked to be otherwise. (We’ll save that for another interview—editor)

LetLifeIn: Do you have any special tricks you use?

Jeremy: Yes, but I don’t think of them as tricks. It’s more like technique. I spend a lot of time looking at her eyes, rather than her other features. I try to look at her and think what she must have looked like when she was seventeen –instead of 55 or 60. I try to rekindle that feeling of youth that lies dormant in most mature women.

LetLifeIn: Do you ever talk dirty too them?

Jeremy: Rarely. Never in conversation, but sometimes in bed, if asked.

LetLifeIn: Okay Jeremy, since you brought it up, let’s talk about “in bed,” if you don’t mind. What’s your secret?

Jeremy: No secret, really. First, I try to get her to relax and feel real comfortable. I caress her and talk softly. I gently kiss and nibble on all her sensitive places. I ask her to be honest with me and tell me her sexual fantasies. I ask for her sexual wish list, so to speak, and nod approvingly at everything she says. I tell her how sexy she looks and how she really turns me on. You’d be surprised how often I hear that the men they know rarely do this.

I take my time—do everything verrry slowly. I get her to a high level of excitement… I use my tongue….my fingers. I make it unbearable. I urge her to surrender…to let go. I never let go myself until she reaches the absolute height of her sexual experience.

When we are finished I tell her what a great lover she is –the best.

LetLifeIn: Whew! I’m exhausted. So at the days end you are satisfied with a job well done.

Jeremy: Yes. I think being a gigolo is an honorable profession. The rewards are many ---not just the money.

LetLifeIn: Thanks Jeremy, for being so open with us. I think I’ve learned a few things.

Jeremy: Thank you, too. May I leave you a few of my cards? <<<

What do you think of the idea of an older person paying for a younger “escort?” Please tell us. Gary@LetLifeIn.com

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Online Dating: Pros and Cons for those 50+

There are about 1,000 dating web sites. Probably, more than that. Online dating makes up 1% of all Internet usage. That means that one out of every 100 people logging on visits an online dating site.

Many of us who are 50+ find that being part of the online dating process -- getting out there and doing something for ourselves -- is positive and empowering whether or not the matches are successful.

In any event, like everything else in life, it has its pros and cons. Here are the ones most frequently mentioned:

Pros

1. There are a lot of people out there to choose from.
Remember high school? Remember college? Remember all those girls and guys there and the tremendous number of possibilities? Well, not since then will you find that many potential dates (and mates) in one place.

It’s also comforting to know that you are not alone—that there are many single people your age out there who are looking for the same things you are. Companionship and perhaps love.

A word of advice: Meet as many people as you can. A mistake many 50+ people make is thinking that meeting two or three people in a month, all of whom they don't like, is a good reason to stop. There is someone out there. Don’t give up.

The mainstream sites allow you to search for singles in specific age ranges and geographic locations, but there are also plenty of sites catering to singles who share an ethnic background, a hobby or a sports interest.

2. It won’t cost you an arm and a leg to participate.
Look at it this way –it’s cheaper than going on a senior cruise to (maybe) meet someone. Also, drinks at a singles bar aren’t cheap. Besides if you are past 50, it’s not as easy to “hang out” like you perhaps did in your younger days.

Although you can find free chat rooms and sites that run personal ads, you are probably better off paying a small fee to a legitimate online dating site to meet people who are more serious about meeting you. Most sites have a sign-up fee of about $25 to $50 as well as a monthly fee.

3. Personal Profiles can say a lot.
Most sites require you to write a personal profile. If written with thought, profiles are an excellent way to describe what a potential date is like. Include hobbies, movies, political beliefs, dreams, goals and favorite activities.

Spend time thinking about what you think someone else would like to read about you. Try to make it fun, funny, wry, whatever you think reflects your personality. Then bounce it off a few friends- ideally of the same gender that you hope to attract - to read through it critically and help you identify what's sounds cool and what sounds corny.

Profiles are most often what makes one decide if there is enough in common to make a connection.

Something to note: If you read a profile that someone has posted that is short and it seems apparent that the person writing it put no thought into it, you can expect that kind of communication in real life.

4. It’s easy to connect with someone without feeling awkward.
Say goodbye to the awkwardness that usually occurs on first dates. By exchanging email you get to know each other slowly and relaxed. If you decide to meet, you’ll already know a lot about each other, and that will help you both feel more comfortable.

Con

1. Free is not always good. Beware, there are some strange people out there.
Some sites allow people to post their profiles and respond to others for free. Unfortunately these free sites often attract some strange people. It’s important to check out the site carefully before you join.

For example, here’s one reader’s experience: “One guy resembled the Incredible Hulk while another said he preferred educated women who would spend their lives serving him. Then there was this fellow who ordered one steak to split while dining at a fancy restaurant. He then informed me that sex was expected at the end of the night because an erectile dysfunction drug had been ingested.”
---Name withheld

2. It may cost more than you think.
Many sites will allow you to view other people’s profiles before joining so you get an idea of who’s available. But some may charge to let you reply to a profile, and here’s where you need to be careful.

Check out the membership dues and rules before you join, especially if you provide a credit card number. Make sure you know exactly how much it will cost, when you’re signing up for an automatic renewal that will be charged to your credit card, and what you will need to do to quit the site when you’re ready.

3. Pictures sometimes aren’t honest.
Photos are often an important component of online profiles. Unfortunately, some people post photos that were taken many years ago, when they looked much younger. Often the photos are extremely flattering and not very true-to-life.

Here’s a good rule of thumb: If you remember that he or she probably won’t look as good as his or her photo, you won’t be disappointed.

4. People can lie, too.
No, really? I’m afraid so. In an effort to get more responses, or in some cases, to deliberately mislead, some people lie in their profiles. Don’t believe everything you read—if he or she sounds too good to be true, he or she probably is. <<

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.