Drug Abuse on the Rise Among Boomers

Boomers Getting Stoned. Boomers who "turned on, tuned in and dropped out" in the seventies are now feuling the rise in drug use among 50-59 year olds.

By Gary Geyer

The Facts:

The government reported that 4.4 percent of baby boomers, ages 50 to 59 admitted to using illicit drugs in the past month. Is this a good percentage or one we should worry about?

This number has steadily increased over the past 3 years for the 50+ age group, according to the records of the National Survey on Drug Use and Health.

Surprisingly, it has been exactly the opposite for young teens: illicit drug use for that age group went down for the third consecutive year.

The annual survey provides an important look at how many Americans drink, smoke and use drugs such as marijuana, cocaine and methamphetamine.

Back to the garden

The peak of drug use among youth in the United States occurred in the late 1970s. The so-called “Woodstock Generation” getting older. It appears now that the “kids” bought the weed with them into the new century. Baby boomers who learned to "turn on, tune in, drop out" as teenagers are fueling a rise in illicit drug use among 50- to 59-year-olds.

Marijuana: Still the drug of choice

Drug use by baby boomers increased from 2.7 percent in 2002 to 4.4 percent last year and climbing. Marijuana was by far their drug of choice, accounting for 70% of the boomers illegal drug use. In more than half of those cases, the drugs were provided free from a friend or a relative. Only 4.3 percent reported buying the drug from a drug dealer or some other contact.

There’s further proof of drug abuse among boomers: A growing number of them are showing up for drug abuse treatment. And if that weren’t enough, the median age of overdose deaths is also moving up.

Just saying ‘No’

The ironic part is that a growing number of the children and grandchildren of boomers are not into drugs at all.



Research shows that baby boomers are still carrying with them their

"far out" attitudes from the 60's and 70's. As a result, the National Survey on Drug Use and Health found that their rates of use were significantly higher compared to the declines among today's teens who are rejecting drug use at higher rates.



Analyzing consequences



The Scripps Howard News Service followed up this trend with a well-researched analysis regarding the consequences of outdated baby boomer attitudes about illegal drug use:



"As America's baby boomers approach senior status, a troubling number are dying from causes that have marked the generation since the 1960s - drug abuse, suicide and accidents.”

An analysis of death records for more than 304,000 boomers who died in 2003 shows the legacies of early and lingering drug use, a tendency toward depression at all stages of life and a stubborn determination not to "act their age."

The study goes on to say that boomers accounted for about half of all people nationwide who died of drug-related causes in 2003. That is far out of proportion to their 26 percent share of the population. Those numbers do not include impaired driving or other accidental causes indirectly related to drug use.

A “Talking Head” has his say

*Dr. Dan Blazer, a Duke University professor of psychiatry, believes he has a “handle” on the problem and asserts: “Since adolescence, they’ve been drinking and using drugs more that previous generations. They’re less likely to have strong religious beliefs, more isolated, twice the divorce rate of the generation before them, and still facing money and work issues they though would be behind them in their 60s.”

The article’s overarching conclusion resides in the headline: “Boomer Doom: Falling Victim to the Culture of Youth.”



*Boomer Blogger Brent Green comments:

There you have it: Boomers were lackadaisical, live-for-today hippies in the sixties; it makes perfect sense that their longstanding self-destructive behaviors would be killing them today.



My point is that there is a longstanding tendency to use the myths and realities of the sixties to cast a uniquely dark and accusatory shadow over the Boomer generation.

The Scripps report, while insightful and helpful on some levels, further perpetuates in its implications the idea that accelerating Boomer mortality is due to inherent and idiosyncratic generational weaknesses. Thus, we’re dying in droves because of drug abuse and perpetuation of our iconoclastic youth culture.

I'm suggesting that we keep these findings in perspective and not be too quick to let selective statistics, subjectively interpreted, stand unchallenged as another covert indictment of the generation and its character. <<


*Excerpted from Brent Green’s Boomer Blog: http://boomers.typepad.com/boomers

Woman Gives Birth to Twins at 60. Talk about Letting Life In…

So what do you think?

"Is it none of our business? What about the children as the parents get even older? 60 is the new 40 – right? Tell us."

In case you haven’t heard, here’s the news:

Frieda Birnbaum gave birth to twin boys. (Jake and Jared). Frieda and Ken, her husband of 38 years were delighted. This was a planned birth, not an accident. Frieda and Ken traveled to a center in South Africa that specializes in in-vitro fertilization for older women. Frieda is 60 and the oldest woman in America to give birth. The person most surprised by Frieda’s pregnancy was her obstetrician, Dr. Abdulla Al-Khan.

Let the controversy begin

Of course, EVERYONE has an opinion -- strangers and family.

Frieda finds herself in the strange position of having to defend her decision to have a child at the ripe old age of 60.

She says, “I think people need to get ready for what's coming up in our society. Whenever there's anything new, people cannot comprehend or have difficult getting comfortable ... There are a lot of middle-aged women having babies — 40s, 50s, now I just turned 60. That's going to be acceptable. They have to just keep up with what's going on with society.”

Frieda’s adult daughterm Alana Birnbaum, 29, doesn’t agree and was not happy with the news. She was quoted in the New York Daily News: “She's youthful for her age but I don't think it's good. She should be going to the gym and taking time for herself — not taking on more stresses and responsibilities. Am I happy at all about this? No. I'm not!”

Frieda believes that the decision was hers and her husband’s to make, and she hopes someday others will realize how much freedom modern women have and feel empowered by it. Frieda believes a woman should make her own decisions based on who she is, not what society dictates.

So what do you think?

Is it none of our business? What about the children as the parents get even older? Do you agree that older people are not what older people were 30 years ago? 60 is the new 40 – right? Is this a perfect example of what “Let Life In” should mean? <<

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Women who are over 50 and date younger men think society disapproves. What’s your opinion of that?

Why Would an older man want a younger woman?

Being Gay or Lesbian and Past 50

"A small roundtable discussion between “Let Life In” (www.LetLifeIn.com) and five gay and lesbian people between 52 and 68 years old."

Being Gay or Lesbian and Past 50


Once upon a time there wasn’t a gay rights movement. Gays and lesbians were harassed by the police and ridiculed by most everyone else. Many kept their homosexuality a secret.

That was only thirty five years ago, in 1969, (the same year as Woodstock), gay activists took a stand at the Stonewall Inn in New York City and the gay rights movement began.

Most of the people who were there from the beginning, if they are still alive today, are certainly 50+, and many of them are seniors.

Thank heaven attitudes have changed. Or have they?

The following is a small roundtable discussion between “Let Life In” (www.LetLifeIn.com) and five gay and lesbian people between 52 and 68 years old. Sometimes serious and sometimes fun, we covered several areas—every thing from health care to…sex.

LetLifeIn.com: You are all gay and past 50. What’s on your minds these days?

Edward: Well, just like just about everyone in the 50+ age group -- gay or straight-- gay and lesbian seniors are concerned about their health. I don’t mean to start us off on a down note -- I don’t know about the rest of you, but the thought of relying on others for health care is very frightening to me because I know we have to turn to networks and social institutions that have not always been tolerant of us.

Ruth: I know what you mean. Gays and lesbians in general, I don’t care what your age is, still encounter negative reactions from health providers. It is especially difficult for we seniors who grew up prior to gay liberation and still remember “the bad old days.”

Ellen: In much of America and Canada, there is still overt discrimination by both the medical profession and the public in general. When we’re looking for health care, we come up against a lot of obstacles.

George: Many gay and lesbian seniors revert back to the closet-- keeping their sexual orientation hidden. Even if we are openly gay in our personal lives, I know many people who withheld that information when they needed health care.

LetLifeIn.com: I can understand that, how else is it different?

Larry: It’s much easier for heterosexual seniors. They usually can rely on their biological family as their support network. That’s not the case for gay and lesbian seniors.

Ellen: You know it. The ironic part is that gay and lesbian seniors usually have larger social networks than straight seniors yet these networks are not recognized by the so called health care professionals.

George: Also, same sex partners don’t have the same rights as family members when it comes to care-giving and even hospital visits. You know if a decision has to be made involving your partner, or even a friend, that decision is invariably given to the biological family rather than to us. As far as they’re concerned, we don’t even exist.

LetLifeIn.com: How do gay and lesbian seniors fit in with the rest of society?

Larry: It depends on where you live, what kind of job you have…

George: how rich you are.

[Laughter]

Larry: The degree to which gays and lesbians are “out” can vary. Older homosexuals are far less secure about their sexuality than those who are younger. It wasn’t as if the doors swung open and all of us danced out.

[Laughter]

Ellen: The youth-oriented culture that is often associated with gay and lesbian communities can have the unfortunate effect of isolating seniors.

Ruth: Often, closeted seniors live alone or with partners without any additional support. I know many of us feel that younger gays and lesbians who are in their 40s and 50s, you know, just a little behind us, should reach out and take on more responsibility.

LetLifeIn.com: Okay, Let’s talk about sexuality.

Ellen: Ah, lest we forget, sexuality, Sexuality, you know, is an important part of homosexuality.

[Laughter]

Ruth: The aging process brings with it special sexual problems for gays and lesbians. It’s not so easy, you know.

Edward: Unfortunately, the (male) gay community presents a particular image as the standard of attractiveness.—young and perfectly buff. If you happen to be getting on in years and still have an active libido, you are too often put down as a “troll” or a “dirty old man.”

Larry: You rang?

[Laughter]

Edward: Seriously, there is nothing wrong with being horny when you’re 20. I speak from experience. Likewise, there is nothing wrong with being horny at 50, 60, 70 or 80 either.

Ellen: Many seniors are in long term relationships. Others are out there looking.

George: We may not all be Brad Pitt, but there is nothing wrong with Sean Connery.

Larry: It’s a matter of physical fitness and a good attitude.

Ellen: Yeah! Self-acceptance is sexy.

LetLifeIn.com: It sounds like you’re saying getting old is a mixed blessing?

Edward: There may be downsides to getting old but there are plenty of rewards. I think gays and straights would agree that older lovers are more…adept.

[Laughter].

Edward: Seriously, maturing enables people to grow into their sexuality. They become more accepting, more understanding, and more willing to explore.

George: Listen, there is no denying, that in a community that puts physical attractiveness as the number one value, aging can be rough. Some who are younger, I feel, resent those they perceive to be old. Seniors are a reminder of immortality—proof that no one stays young and unwrinkled forever.

Ellen: Let’s hear it for Botox!

[Laughter]

Larry: On the other hand, some gays who are older disrespect the young ones --maybe resenting [in a somewhat haughty manner] “the unlimited horizons that was once theirs.”

50plusMag: So in the end, what really counts?

Ruth: I think we probably all agree that sex can be enjoyable at any age and that sexual energy and a beautiful body is great. But what really counts in sex is when you connect— to others and to yourself. And that only happens with “emotional generosity,” I read that once.

George: But then again, as Shakespeare once said, “Father Time is a hunk.” <<


For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Boomer / Senior Suicide on the Rise

"Every 90 minutes a person 65 or older commits suicide. An “empty” feeling, a worthless feeling, nervousness, restlessness, irritability, lack of enjoyment of things previously enjoyed, sleeping more (or less) than usual, chronic pain, persistent headaches and/or stomach aches, a feeling of being unloved and that life is not worth living anymore. Depressing, isn’t it?"

Here’s some shocking news:

Baby Boomers are more prone to committing suicide than any generation before them. To make matters scarier, boomers are approaching their senior years facing a fact that seniors have the highest suicide rate of any age group (and that rate grows even higher as we get older).

Those over 65 represent about 13% of the United States population. But when it comes to suicide, the percentage is close to 20%.

Put in more dramatic way…

Every 90 minutes a person 65 or older commits suicide.

Why is that?

There are of course, many factors: The perception of poor health rather than an actual specific illness; poor sleep quality; loneliness; lack of friends or relatives to confide in; fading memory and other brain disorders; financial stress and not to be overlooked, the possession of firearms. (Firearms are the most common method of suicide used in later life.)*
Surprisingly, medical illness and alcohol don’t seem to be a factor.

Seniors are funny.

Many seniors have no problem telling you about their aches and pains. But unlike younger generations, when it comes to their mental health—depression, loneliness, etc— their lips are sealed. There’s also a myth out there that it is normal to be depressed as one gets older. That leaves many people who might otherwise be helped by medications, go untreated.

Here are some symptoms to look out for:

An “empty” feeling, a worthless feeling, nervousness, restlessness, irritability, lack of enjoyment of things previously enjoyed, sleeping more (or less) than usual, chronic pain, persistent headaches and/or stomach aches, a feeling of being unloved and that life is not worth living anymore. Depressing, isn’t it?

Some hope.

According to a recent study, strong social support and religious beliefs may act as a suicide deterrent. The study reported that many seniors say they get a great deal of comfort and support from their religion.

Doctors need to be more aware of the suicide potential of their older patients and start asking more direct questions. Instead of asking “Do you have feelings of depression?” a question like, “Are you having suicidal thoughts?” is more to the point.

What we all can do.

We must start watching out for each other and notice warning signs. We need to show we care. Our friends (even those who are just acquaintances) and relatives need our support and understanding. A visit or even a phone call can make a difference.

We all deserve to live longer lives.
Editor’s note: This is a serious problem that can effect us all. Please offer your suggestions on how we all can help.

*Experts believe it is not the presence of firearms in the home that is the risk factor but rather the recent purchase of a firearm. In states that have background checks or waiting periods for handgun purchases, suicide rates have declined dramatically. <<

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

For Those 50+, Gambling is all Fun and Games. Wanna' Bet?

According to a Forbes magazine article, Americans “lose more money gambling than they spend on movie tickets, theme parks, spectator sports and video games combined.”


For Those 50+, Gambling is all Fun and Games. Wanna' Bet?

Gambling is fun, right?

For most people 50+, gambling is entertainment, pure and simple. It's a chance to escape with friends, get away from day to day stresses and have fun. Winning money is a bonus, not the primary objective. Most seniors who gamble continue to take care of their health and financial obligations.

Vegas, here we come!

For an increasing number of older citizens, (pre-seniors, seniors and retirees) casino gambling has become the new form of recreation and entertainment. Older adults now form the largest age group of annual visitors to Las Vegas and have become a significant segment of the population who frequent riverboat, Indian reservation, and the commercial gambling casino industry.

Time and Money.

Older adults have two characteristics that make them attractive to the gaming industry: time and for many, accumulated wealth. Gambling machines are fun and exciting and don't require a great deal of concentration or knowledge. Just pop in those quarters.

Safe environment.

Casinos and bingo parlors have worked hard to be seen as safe and friendly entertainment venues and they fill a social void for many older adults. The casino atmosphere is both stimulating and inclusive. Everybody is welcome!

G rated, sort of.

The stigma that once surrounded gambling is gone, especially for women. Community groups, such as retirement and senior centers, visit casinos regularly and often sponsor casino nights. Casinos are willing to provide transportation from senior sites as a convenience to older citizens, many of whom limit their driving to within a local area.

Boffo entertainment, free drinks and all you can eat.

Casinos often provide entertainment such as big band music, champagne fountains and free shrimp cocktails that patrons would not be subject to elsewhere. Casino staff is trained to be friendly and especially accommodating to older citizens. Additionally, casinos offer low-cost buffet meals that are hard for anyone to turn down.

But, it’s not all wine and roses.

For a growing number of people in the over 50 age segment, sadly, gambling can be a losing proposition . An easily accessible minor habit of gambling may become a potentially devastating pastime.

According to a recent study made by McNeilly and Burke, middle-aged to older women (who comprise the largest portion of the older adult population) are believed to be among the fastest growing group of those who gamble –sometimes to relieve feelings of isolation, loneliness or boredom.

Danger!

Problems can occur when more time and attention are needed as the gambler attempts to win back what he or she has lost. If the losses continue, the gambler may have to sell possessions or property to cover expenses, or seek risky or high interest loans. Often, the problem gambler avoids friends and family and lies about his or her activities.

7 signs of potential gambling problems:

gambling more often
gambling for more money
gambling for longer periods of time
being preoccupied with gambling or with obtaining money with which to gamble
gambling in spite of negative consequences, such as large losses, taking out secret loans, or tapping into savings or pension plans
having frequent mood swings, higher when winning, lower when losing
gambling as a means to cope with loneliness, stress or depression
Here are some tips from The Minnesota Institute of Public Health on how to reduce the risk of developing a gambling problem.

The decision to gamble should be a personal choice.
No one should feel pressured to gamble. Many people will choose to gamble socially, for a limited period of time and with predetermined limits for losses. Others will simply have no desire to gamble. Some people with a family history of gambling problems or other addictions may choose not to risk gambling at all.

Gambling is not essential for having a good time.
The real value of social activities is being with friends and taking time out from the pressures of daily living. Gambling should not be seen as necessary for having fun and being with friends. Gambling can be an enjoyable complement to other activities but shouldn't be seen as the only method of socializing.

What constitutes an acceptable loss needs to be established before starting to gamble.
People need to expect that they will lose more often than they will win. The odds are always against winning. Any money spent on gambling needs to be considered the cost of entertainment. Money needed to provide for basic needs, such as food, clothing, shelter and medications, should not be used for gambling. People should only gamble money they can afford to lose and avoid betting when the level is out of their range. For those who choose to gamble, it is essential to know when to stop.

Borrowing money to gamble should be avoided and discouraged.
Borrowing money from a friend or relative, writing bad checks, pawning personal possessions, taking out home equity loans or credit card cash advances with the intention of repaying with gambling winnings is always high-risk and inappropriate.

There are certain high risk situations during which gambling should be avoided.
They include when you are:

feeling lonely, angry, depressed or under stress;
coping with the death or loss of a loved one;
trying to solve any personal or family problems; or
trying to impress others.
Using alcohol or other drugs when gambling is risky.
Alcohol or other drug use can affect a person's judgment and can interfere with his/her ability to control gambling and adhere to predetermined limits.

Where to go for help, if needed:

Gamblers Anonymous: 1-213-386-8789 or .
National Council on Problem Gambling: 1-800-522-4700.
So to end on a positive note, remember to keep gambling in perspective. It should be (if you choose) just part of your life—not all of it. Have fun, make friends and have a great time. <<


For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

HIV / AIDS after 50: What You don't Know Can Kill You

50+ Issues: "Almost 20% of persons living with HIV / AIDS in the United States are 50 years of age or older. Here's what you need to know."

Outrageous and upsetting news!

Almost 20% of persons living with HIV / AIDS in the United States are 50 years of age or older.

Three distinct groups.

The advent and wide availability of Highly Active Antiretroviral Therapy (HAART) in the developed world has extended the life expectancy for people living with HIV/AIDS, and has thereby created several distinct populations of older adults in relation to HIV disease.

1. The newly infected.


First are those older adults who have become newly infected with HIV in later life.



2. Long term survivors.


Second, are the long term survivors, who were infected much earlier and are now able to grow old with HIV/AIDS due to the tremendous advancement in HIV treatment.



3. HIV negative people engaging in risky behavior.


Third are those older adults who may be HIV negative, but are unaware of their risk for infection, engaging in behaviors that increase their risk for exposure to HIV.

We know through research that compared to younger persons, those 50+ are less likely to use condoms or practice methods of safe sex. They are less likely to be tested for HIV, or to know their own HIV status.

Misconceptions and ageist attitudes.


Misconceptions and ageist attitudes about aging and sexuality continue. Older people are seen as asexual, heterosexual and monogamous by society and health care providers.

Yet older adults are exposed to HIV by the same means as younger persons.

These risk factors will certainly continue to increase in the coming years with the aging of the Baby Boom generation and their generational mindset related to drug use and sexuality.

Social, physical and psychological challenges.

Once infected with HIV disease, older adults experience multiple social, physical and psychological challenges that negatively impact their quality of life.

Social Challenges.

As we age, our social resources may decline through loss of friends, family and other informal supports. Research has consistently found that older adults with HIV/AIDS have a very high likelihood of living alone.

Such living arrangements may result in social isolation and limited assistance with physical care needs which may in turn exacerbate psychological problems such as depression. Becoming HIV infected may result in a severing of social ties from family and friends.

As one 51 year old man stated, "You feel more closed …You just don't feel like you can socialize anymore."

Physical Challenges.

While the management of HIV disease is a challenge for most individuals, older adults have the added complication of possibly having more than one diagnosable condition at the same time.

The physical well- being of older persons may be impacted not only by HIV, but also by age-related diseases such as arthritis, non-HIV related respiratory or cardiac disease, or other disease processes.

While older persons with HIV/AIDS have been found to be more compliant with HIV medications than their younger counterparts, there is an increased likelihood of drug-drug interactions between HIV medications and those prescribed for other medical conditions.

Simply put, HIV complicates the already difficult process of managing age related disease processes.

Psychological Challenges.

While many older adults living with HIV/AIDS have adjusted well to their illness, a sizable minority of HIV-infected older adults confront a variety of psychological issues.

In a National Institute of Mental Health study, 32% of the HIV infected older adults interviewed voiced symptoms of depression. The psychological impact of the disease is compounded by internalized stigma emanating from an AIDS phobic society.

One 72 year old man interviewed stated, "You don't what people to know you have this dreaded disease…I would rather get run over by a truck than die of AIDS. That's what I'm hoping for; I'm hoping that nobody else finds out."

Late detection.

Rates of HIV infection (not AIDS) in seniors are especially difficult to determine because older people are not routinely tested.

Most older people are first diagnosed with HIV at a late stage of infection, and often become ill with AIDS-related complications and die sooner than their younger counterparts; these deaths can be attributed to original misdiagnoses and immune systems that naturally weaken with age.

The double stigma.

Older people with HIV/AIDS face a double stigma: ageism and infection with a sexually-or-IV-drug transmitted disease.

Because of the stigmas, it can be difficult for seniors---women, in particular---to disclose their HIV status to family, friends and their community.

Heterosexual infections on the rise.

While men who have sex with men form the largest group of AIDS cases in the over-50 population, the number of cases in women infected heterosexually have been rising at a higher rate and comprise a greater percentage as age increases into the 60s and older.

HIV and older women

For women over 50, there are special considerations: after menopause, condom use for birth control becomes unimportant, and normal aging changes such as a decrease in vaginal lubrication and thinning vaginal walls can put them at higher risk during unprotected sexual intercourse.

Age symptoms confused with HIV symptoms.

As HIV symptoms often are similar to those associated with aging (fatigue, weight loss, dementia, skin rashes, and swollen lymph nodes), misdiagnosis is frequent in older people who are, in fact, infected.

The lack-of-support syndrome.

Seniors often are less likely to find support and comfort among family and friends, and because they are traditionally not comfortable in support groups, they may be less inclined to join them, citing lack of shared experiences concerning different issues.

The sin of omission.

Due to the general lack of awareness of HIV/AIDS in older adults, this segment of the population, for the most part, has been omitted from research, clinical drug trials, educational prevention programs and intervention efforts.

Cases of new HIV infection among older persons will continue and likely increase for the foreseeable future, while increasing numbers of people will live into old age with HIV/AIDS.

It is incumbent upon us to provide improved systems of care for these individuals. <<

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Not Recommended: Growing Old in Prison

"If you think growing old can be tough, try doing it in a prison. One segment of the 50+ population that is seldom mentioned in stories about our so-called golden years involves those who face the fact that they will most likely spend the remainder of their lives behind bars."

Prison conditions, especially for those getting on in years, can be horrendous.

In prison you age quicker

To many of us age 55 sounds pretty young, but aging is different for prisoners. From a health standpoint, elderly prisoners are about 10 years older than their chronological age due to characteristics of their lives before entering prison. Low socio-economic status, lack of access to health care, drug or alcohol use and years of living a hard life usually takes its toll.

A growing population

Just how many prisoners are we talking about? Using 50 as the definite age, there are approximately 125,000 elderly prisoners nationwide - about 11 percent of the total prison population. The number of older prisoners has more than doubled in a decade, and the increase is expected to continue.

Who are those people

Older inmates fall into three categories. There are "lifers", who have been in prison for their whole lives, new elderly offenders, who are sentenced in their 40s or 50s, and chronic re-offenders, who have been in and out of prison consistently.

The wants and needs of elderly inmates

Not surprising, being older and in prison is considerably more difficult than serving time when you are young. Studies show that elderly prisoners need more orderly conditions, safety precautions, emotional feedback and familial support than younger prisoners. They are especially uncomfortable in crowded conditions and tend to want time alone.

The old vs. the young

The relationship between older and younger inmates can be a problem. Most elderly prisoners are still integrated with other age groups, leaving them susceptible to intimidation and thievery. Older inmates are very vulnerable to the population that's stronger than them.

Fear leads to isolation

The fear of becoming a victim no doubt has an impact on one's daily life. Many prisons house aging prisoners in separate cells from younger inmates but do not exclude them from mixing in the yard with everyone else. Older inmates are often so scared of mingling that they don't go outside.

Health concerns

Then there is the matter of health. There are many concerns facing elderly prisoners, such as the lack of an adequate or balanced diet and insufficient preventive health care..

Men

It has been reported that the most common illness among elderly men in prison are diabetes and hepatitis C. Many are on dialysis machines, receive oxygen or have cancer.

Diabetes is especially problematic because non-medical prisons rarely cater to those with special dietary needs. Prisoners with diabetes usually eat the same food as other inmates - meals full of sugar and carbohydrates. Just think what a daily plate of pancakes and syrup can do.

Women

Female prisoners are at an even greater health risk. At just two percent of the prison population, their needs are most neglected. Older females, many of them grandmothers, have special health care needs that are very distinct from men.

Therapeutic services, cervical and breast cancer screenings and nutritional meals containing calcium and fresh vegetables as well as other necessary health programs are not widely available.

The shock of imprisonment

Imagine you are over 50 and just coming into prison and being isolated from your friends and family for the first time. It's hard experiencing a multitude of losses simultaneously.

According to the American Civil Liberties Union, most crimes are committed by people in their late teens and early 20s. In California, for example, only 22 percent of all felony adult arrests in 1999 were people over age 39. Only 5 percent were above 50 years old and only 1 percent above 60.

Are things getting better or worse?

As people live longer, are in better health and have more energy, they sometimes get involved in things that might get them in trouble.

Unfortunately, a rise in senior crime is evident. We are seeing many more older people convicted of felonies, such as drug crimes, physical attacks and murder - most often against a spouse or neighbor. Some theories on the increase point to money problems, loneliness, depression, alcohol and drug abuse problems.

Its truly sad that at the point in life when contentment should be our goal, many of us are facing the most difficult challenges one can imagine.

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Sugar Daddies and the Women Who Love Them

The dictionary describes a Sugar Daddy as a wealthy older man who gives a young person expensive gifts in return for companionship or intimacy. In the 30’s, sugar daddies were a staple in movie comedies and musicals. Today, thanks to the internet, they are more sought after than ever. If you have an opinion on this topic please let us know
What follows are excerpts from a web forum whose participants are older wealthy men and younger women who are looking for them.
“I happen to want something more than a straight swap of money for sex. I am looking for a young girl to have as a lover and a friend, someone who will help me feel young while I ease her financial burden and show her the good life. A straight money exchange implies the person might not even like you... what's the allure of that?”
“For myself, this is how I see my role as a sugar daddy. I am not looking for an arrangement to meet once or twice a month. I have been very successful in my career and I am looking for someone to share the good times with me. To me that means helping a special woman out there in her daily life so that she can have the freedom to enjoy life with me and not have to worry about the everyday problems of having to support herself.”
“I think we all have to be honest and admit we are all here for a reason no matter how you sugarcoat it. We all have different thoughts yes. Some men act like women should be jumping for them because they claim to have money. Some girls may jump. If I have a daddy he will be well taken care of out of respect and desire not money. Money is a bonus.”
“I know what I want and that is to meet a gentlemen who will give me allowances, take me shopping, etc. In return I will be the hot female on his arm, among other things. I'm looking for help financially, but not a relationship. Well maybe, if it's right.”
“I figured it would be easy to find a nice gentlemen who wanted a beautiful lady to spoil BUT I come to find out there's only ONE way to get spoiled HAVE SEX WITH THESE MEN OR NO SPOILING.”
“The type of man I want to be with is able to take care of me. Women are biologically attracted to men with money, just like men are biologically attracted to a small waist and full lips. It's facts of life.”
“I'm only looking for adventure and sure sex is part of adventure as well as communication, honesty and trust. I do let any gentlemen know in advance that I expect to receive perks, gratuity, and benefits for my time and companionship.”
“.....perks, gratuities, and benefits for your time and companionship"???????? lol I hate to sound insulting, but I think this is where the line is crossed. You are wanting to get paid for services rendered...I'm sorry but this sounds too much like a business deal (prostitution).”
“For me personally, I refuse to feel treated like a transaction. Foremost, I am a woman. I want someone who will spoil me and become an asset in my life because they care about me. Now don't misunderstand me, I am not asking for someone's hand in marriage, but sex without emotion TO ME equivocates prostitution... a transaction.”
“Some view it as a straight business arrangement and if that's what makes both of them happy, then great! However, that's not exactly for me. I actually have a brain, so I'd like to be treated as more than just arm candy. Just like I'm sure the guy has a personality and feelings, so he'd like to be treated as more than just an ATM. That's just my two cents!”
“My ideas differ from most I guess. I like the idea of here and there weekends somewhere, sharing my time and fun with a beautiful young lady. I pay all expenses and then some and she enjoys a great time with me. It's what it is...but it works! No expectations other than a good time. I just don’t have time for "feelings" and such that are the result of a normal relationship. But I am fun and nice and have had NO complaints!”
I am looking for something I have been missing for a long time...excitement, fun, flirtation, as well as a little "love.” In return, I will help this lady with things she must get...rent, car payment, allowance, etc... This is reality, not the movies. I really don't think I am going to find some Cover girl, who will fall in love with me, and ladies, if you are looking for Richard Gere in "Pretty Woman", I think you are going to be disappointed. If we realize, that we are real people in search of something, I think we will all do alright. I hope so anyway.”

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Cosmetic Surgery for Boomer Men. Why not?

As Newsweek noted a few months ago, baby boomers are turning 50 in droves.Maybe we are just looking in the mirror more, but suddenly we’re noticing things we didn’t notice a few years back. You know, wrinkles, frown lines, crow’s feet, droopy eyelids, baldness and double chins. “That couldn’t possibly be me,” you think. “Why do I look so old and tired?”So what’s a feller to do?Well, for one thing, more and more men in our age group are having cosmetic surgery to help them look younger and attractive. Like women, they have discovered the benefits of cosmetic surgery – both personally and professionally. Of course diet and exercise are still the most important factors when it comes to good health. But more and more, plastic surgery is moving into the mainstream of life for men over 50.Popular, routine, and affordable.The fact is, plastic surgery has become more popular, routine, and affordable. The stigma of vanity seems to be gone. People aren't afraid to admit that they're considering the idea. Hey, we don't even call it a nose job a "nose job" any more. How's that for stigma reduction?At the officeOne company CEO we know says that his decision to have a facelift was part business, part personal. Today, there are a growing number of mature business men who are concerned with not just looking more attractive but being more competitive on the job. Unfortunately, youth still rules.Let’s face it -- society still puts a premium on youth. 50-year-old executives are often competing with guys who are 20 years younger. The perception is that a 30-year-old is willing to work harder, and for lots less money. (Could it be true?)The big question.Many boomer men have voiced this thought: What’s the use of spending a lot of time at the gym and watching yout diet if you stll wind up with a tired face? No doubt about it -- baggy eyelids and a tired looking appearance affect perception of the ability to perform on the job. In the business world the feeling is if you look tired or don’t take care of yourself, you won’t keep up.On the home front.It’s not just busy business executives in fear of losing their jobs that are responsible for the boom in cosmetic surgery. Men are feeling they want to keep pace with their (younger-looking) wives. It’s only natural to think, “Now that I have a young-looking wife I better take a look at myself.”Easing into it.Men usually start out slower than women. They may start by going to hair salons instead of barber shops, having facials and other skin toning treatments, and shopping at cosmetic counters.Skin Care For MenIt is not uncommon at all for men to use moisturizers and sunscreens. Shaving can be a problem for some men whose skin can become irritated and rough. New exfoliating products and soothing creams help to reduce wrinkles and keep the skin looking younger.Taking the plunge.The logical next steps are non-surgical cosmetic procedures. That includes Botox injections, laser hair removal, microdermabrasion, chemical peels, collagen injections and laser resurfacing.Laser resurfacing. One of the newer and more popular procedures today is lasrer resurfacing. It’s specialties are leathery, sun-damaged skin and wrinkles.ZAP!The laser, also used to zap unwanted body hair and acne scars, is a major advance in the boomer man’s war against wrinkles. Its precise, controlled light beam allows surgeons to target specific areas of the face--usually around the eyes and mouth--or treat the entire face.The laser doesn't replace a facelift because it doesn't dramatically reverse sagging. However, its effect on skin surface is remarkable. Leathery, crinkly skin can become smooth as a 20 year old’s.Men seem to want what women want.Like women, men over 50 want trimmer waists and fewer wrinkles. And they want more hair on their heads. (Hair transplants top the list of the most common procedures.) We’ve come a long way, baby.Many men are now rejuvenating their faces with face, neck and eye lifts and forehead and brow lifts. They are having lasers and peels to remove the wrinkles and make their skin look younger. Some are re-sculpting their noses and undergoing liposuction, tummy tucks and even breast reductions (gynecomastia).You ain’t heard nothin’ yet!The new non-ablative lasers and tissue tightening devices such as Thermage, offer mini-lifts without surgery. Add to that new fillers such as Restylane and Perlane that now give men more choices to remove lines and wrinkles and fill in deep creases and folds.Bye-bye double chins, spare tires and love handles. The Vaser, a new liposuction procedure, eliminates double chins, spare tires, love handles and even beer bellies. The Liposuction process.Because liposuction removes localized fat that doesn’t respond to diet and exercise, it is one of the best procedures to help men attain the body shape they want. When working out isn’t enough.Many men who are over 50 work out and take care of their health but find they still have extra fat around the mid-section or back. Because liposuction removes localized fat that doesn’t respond to diet and exercise, it is one of the best procedures to help men in those areas.The “Endo” brow-lift.The endoscopic brow lift is a fairly new, minimal-incision technique that removes deep vertical lines between the brows. (Scowlers, take note.} Surgeons use an endoscope, a narrow instrument hooked up to a video monitor, and do the entire operation through several tiny slits near the scalp line.Small incisions mean faster recovery time, less hair loss, less nerve damage, and smaller scars. (The scars are so minimal that even balding men can have the surgery.) It’s amazing. Who would’ve thought the upper third part of the face contributes so much to appearance.Chests, calves, buttocks, thighs, arms and abdomens.Boomer Men are also having pectoral implants to increase the size of their chests and calf implants (I’m embarrassed to write this) for more shapely legs.Body contouring to lift the buttocks, thigh, arms and abdomen help to reshape the body and remove excess, hanging skin. This procedure is especially useful after weight loss of 50 to 100 pounds or more, and is becoming more common.Before you decide to do anything…Read up on the procedure you are interested in and find out if it's really right for you. Get the details on what will happen before, during and after surgery. How long is the recovery time? What are the medical risks and aftereffects?If you have questions (and you SHOULD} call the American Society of Plastic and Reconstructive Surgeons (ASPRS) which represents 97 percent of all physicians certified by the American Board of Plastic Surgery. Their Plastic Surgery Information Hotline is: 1-800-635-0635. You'll get reading material and a referral to resources in or near where you live.

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Sexual Secrets of a Gigolo

"Jeremy (not his real name) is a professional paid “escort,” a Gigolo. His specialty is older women. Jeremy is 38 years old. His “clients," between 50 and 70."

www.LetLifeIn.com Interview by Gary Geyer

LetLifeIn: Welcome Jeremy. Thank you for meeting with me.

Jeremy: It’s my pleasure.

LetLifeIn: Jeremy, all your clients are past 50 and you are just 38. Is that just a coincidence?

Jeremy: No, No. I’m actually attracted to mature women. I find them easier to talk to and be with. And I must admit, the fact that they are attracted to me is great for my ego.

LetLifeIn: Jeremy, I don’t know how to ask this question tactfully. You use the term “gigolo.” Aren’t you really a male prostitute?

Jeremy: No. Not at all. And don’t worry -- I’m not offended. A prostitute is generally for sex only. Slam bam, you know. A gigolo is, I’m speaking for myself, someone who is very much concerned with giving his client pleasure. Sexual pleasure, yes—but also understanding her as a woman --- her wishes, her desires; what she likes and what she doesn’t.

Her agenda becomes my agenda. I think of myself as someone who represents the best in men in both character and sexual skill. I always conduct myself in a way so that I bring credit to myself and pleasure to my clients.

LetLifeIn: What makes you good at what you do?

Jeremy: Well, that’s a good question. How much time have you got?

LetLifeIn: Plenty. Go on –don’t worry.

Jeremy: I think the most important thing is that I am attentive. I pay attention to what the woman I’m with is saying as well as what her body language is saying. I think sometimes the body language is far more honest than the words.

LetLifeIn: What else?

Jeremy: I compliment her often. I make her feel special. It’s always about her. Never about me. I’m not the kind of guy who struts around drawing the attention. I make sure she gets it.

LetLifeIn: I don’t know, Jeremy. You look like a pretty spiffy guy.

Jeremy: I believe I should present myself well. I dress nicely – never in jeans, my nails are clean and manicured. I speak softly, but confidently. I’m always a gentlemen, although in the bedroom I am sometimes asked to be otherwise. (We’ll save that for another interview—editor)

LetLifeIn: Do you have any special tricks you use?

Jeremy: Yes, but I don’t think of them as tricks. It’s more like technique. I spend a lot of time looking at her eyes, rather than her other features. I try to look at her and think what she must have looked like when she was seventeen –instead of 55 or 60. I try to rekindle that feeling of youth that lies dormant in most mature women.

LetLifeIn: Do you ever talk dirty too them?

Jeremy: Rarely. Never in conversation, but sometimes in bed, if asked.

LetLifeIn: Okay Jeremy, since you brought it up, let’s talk about “in bed,” if you don’t mind. What’s your secret?

Jeremy: No secret, really. First, I try to get her to relax and feel real comfortable. I caress her and talk softly. I gently kiss and nibble on all her sensitive places. I ask her to be honest with me and tell me her sexual fantasies. I ask for her sexual wish list, so to speak, and nod approvingly at everything she says. I tell her how sexy she looks and how she really turns me on. You’d be surprised how often I hear that the men they know rarely do this.

I take my time—do everything verrry slowly. I get her to a high level of excitement… I use my tongue….my fingers. I make it unbearable. I urge her to surrender…to let go. I never let go myself until she reaches the absolute height of her sexual experience.

When we are finished I tell her what a great lover she is –the best.

LetLifeIn: Whew! I’m exhausted. So at the days end you are satisfied with a job well done.

Jeremy: Yes. I think being a gigolo is an honorable profession. The rewards are many ---not just the money.

LetLifeIn: Thanks Jeremy, for being so open with us. I think I’ve learned a few things.

Jeremy: Thank you, too. May I leave you a few of my cards? <<<

What do you think of the idea of an older person paying for a younger “escort?” Please tell us. Gary@LetLifeIn.com

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Are Our Best Sexual Years Behind Us?

Over 50, over the hill.

You're tired, you're bored. You don't look or feel as good as you did when you were thirty. Neither does your partner.
Great sex is just in your dreams.

It's unfortunate, but that's what many of us past 50 think.

Bah, Humbug!

I'm here to tell you, at your age you should know better.
And, as my grandson would say, "Get over it!"

You know where sexual feeling starts? In your head.

Before you can have enjoyable, satisfying sex, you have to change your way if thinking. You have to stop believing that all those things mentioned above matter.

The fact is you are still capable of feeling pleasure. You are still capable of having feelings of physical love and desire for your partner.

50 plus Ain't What it Used To Be.

Look around. 50 (and over) isn't what it used to be. Sting, Harrison Ford, Jeff Bridges. Goldie Hawn, Cybil Shepard, Tina Turner. Need I go on?

I'm sure I don't have to tell you this -- baby boomers have changed everything. We are the generation that refuses to "act our age."

Here Are The Facts.

The quality of our sex after 50 is different. Not worse -- different. Yes, our sexual responses change from what they were when we were younger.

Men

For example, a man seldom gets an erection simply by viewing his partner. That doesn't mean he isn't aroused or interested. After 35 or 40, a man needs direct stimulation of the penis to get an erection. Once he understands this he can learn to appreciate the slower build-up of sexual tension and enjoy a wider range of sensations -not just in the penis, but the whole body. He enters a new phase of his sexual development. He is now more able to experience the pleasures of giving satisfaction not just receiving it.

If a man is healthy physically, there is no reason why he can't continue to have erections and enjoy sex into old age.

Women

Many women fear that menopause means the end of their sex life.
It's actually just the opposite.

Women report that instead of experiencing declining sexual desire as they anticipated, their desire increases following menopause.

The shift in a woman's hormonal balance increases her libido and the ability to have orgasms. In fact, a woman's ability to have multiple orgasms is not affected by her age and her orgasms are often more intense.

In addition, many women past 50 find they can be more assertive than they were in their thirties. And many men find that a turn-on.

Don't Let Your Head Get in The Way.

Emotional maturity and self confidence of both men and women in their fifties allows for a more intimate relationship, sustainable for many years to come

And lest we forget at any age, the physical and psychological benefits of sex are numerous-everything from reducing stress to easing of depression.

Here's to your health!

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Cher: Refusing to Turn Back Time

At this point in Cher’s life, is there anybody alive who hasn’t read or heard everything there is about her and formed an opinion?

We’ll see.

On who she is

”I spend half my time trying to let people know who I am, and the other half trying to hide myself from people.”

“People think that because you're a bit flamboyant, you are not serious, or that you aren't pensive, or that you don't have strong opinions. I have opinions that I don't think I could ever voice until I got old enough not to give a s--- what people think.”

“I'm not sure that I have the guts to actually be as outspoken as I'd like to be. Underneath, I think I'm still really a radical. And I think that '60s thing doesn't exactly go away.”

On being called a “diva”

“That comes from you, the journalists. How did I get that reputation? Because I am so not the diva. And every time someone asks me what a diva is, I say that it's someone who thinks they are superior and is demanding all the time, for no reason.”

”I don't care what anyone calls me. It doesn't make a difference to me but that is just not who I am.”

On having “some work done”

"Yes, I have had a facelift, but who hasn't? I have become the plastic surgery poster girl. I asked my 90-year-old grandmother what she wanted for her 90th birthday and she wanted collagen in her lips!”

“Everyone says I am terrified of getting old but the truth is that in my job becoming old and becoming extinct are one and the same thing."

On Sonny

“We used to fight all the time and it didn't make any real difference. We never fought when we were married, that's the strange thing… I just always gave in. But, afterwards, we would fight, but, ya know, it didn't make any difference.”

"We had the strangest relationship. When were in court he had tried to sue me and have Chastity taken away from me and he said I was an unfit mother, and then he lost and as we were coming out of the court he grabbed me and kissed me. If it had been anyone else but him I probably would have punched them, but because we had such a strange relationship, I just started to laugh."

“I have dreams about him, ya know? It's, like, really weird – he just kinda hangs around.”

On younger men

”As I got older, men my age weren't interested in me. It’s like they didn't want to be caught dead with a woman my age. They're on their third family, and they always go for the 25-year-old girl. Once I turned 40, it was the younger guys who were attracted to me.”

On looking for a relationship

”You know, you don't look for that. You stumble over it. You fall
into it, but you don't go looking for relationships. They either happen or they don't.”

On children

”I couldn’t imagine never being a mother. I think that my life would have been empty without them.”

On her dry spell acting career

“When you get to a certain age you just don’t get many offers until you get much older. There is a big spot where it’s a long dry spell.”

“I’m in no man’s land, literally, because men are the people who make the choices in this business. I’m not their fantasy. When they are in their 50’s and 60’s, it’s their fantasy to be with someone young.”

On depression in the family

”It's absolutely in every one of us. It's in my grandmother, my mother, my children. I call it the gift-curse that you just deal with. Sometimes you deal with it well and sometimes you deal with it badly.”

”They still don't know enough about it, as far as I'm concerned. In my mother's time they knew nothing about it; my poor grandmother, she suffered a lot. I think as the generations go down, they do find out more information. But still, it's not like you can go get a blood test or MRI. It's all guesswork; it's definitely not a science.”

“It's something that I am making peace with -- no, I'm not making peace, because you don't make peace with it. You learn how to live with it. You either flow with it or it breaks you.”

“There are things that you give up for it and there are other things that you get that make you very artistic and sensitive. As negative as it could be with my mother's moods, the positive things were so positive. My mother would encourage me about being special and being gifted.”

“My mother was the most creative, fantastic person and would come up with great things to do. She'd buy art supplies and all of us would sit around painting. I was lucky. But then she would be really depressed and have a hard time coming out of her room. See, when you're young, it all seems normal to you.”

On aging

“When I turned 40, I just thought, 'You know what? Age is just bypassing me…then 45, and I'm thinking, 'I still look good.' Then 47 comes, and I'm running on the treadmill…I'm starting to notice it, little backache, little neck ache, get that lipstick perfect. It's a lot more output for less gain.”

On what advice she gives to herself

“Just to keep going every day, to continue being excited, fresh, interested and not just focus on yourself -- you know, try to divide your time between doing stuff for yourself and family and charity. It takes a lot of time.”


For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.letlifein.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Rod Stewart: Some Guys have all the Luck

"Rod Stewart is famous for several things other than music. Beautiful women, for example. The list of his relationships include....."

Music aside, Rod Stewart’s life has been anything but dull.
As the song says, every picture tells a story, don’t it?

Starting off with a bang.

Roderick David Stewart was born January 10, 1945 in Highgate, London. Rod was the youngest of five children.
His parents owned a newsagent’s shop in North London and the family lived above the shop.

A few minutes before Rod was born, a German V-2 rocket hit a police station down the street and the explosion heralded his birth.

The pre-rock star years.

It was the early sixties and Rod opened his mind to alternative ways of thinking. He found himself interested in folk music and left wing politics. He became a beatnik and a communist;

Rod described himself: “I was your actual beatnik, mate. Your actual Jack Kerouac. Ban the bomb. You name it, we ban it. Anti-apartheid. Save cats. Save dogs. Shag in tents…What a life. What a life.”

Rod music interests began to change and he became more interested in upcoming rock and roll bands like the Yardbirds and The Rolling Stones.

Rod the Mod.

During the next 10 years Rod performed in five different rock groups* before moving to the United States, applying for citizenship and becoming a superstar. (A brief history follows this article.)

Do you think I’m sexy?

Rod, as we all know, is famous for several things other than music. Beautiful women, for example. The list of his relationships include (actress) Britt Ekland and the two women he married—Alana Hamilton (George’s ex) and (supermodel) Rachel Hunter.

Oops. Did I say that?

An unfortunate quote of Rod’s was that he would rather have his penis cut off than to cheat on Rachel Hunter. When she later sued him for divorce it was on the grounds of adultery.

Rod met his current love, (cover-girl turned photographer) Penny Lancaster, the same night he split with Rachel.

Hotel rooms and tarts.

Although mellower than he was in the early days, Rod is amazingly unapologetic of his antics of his early rock years. He condemns today’s headline-seeking rock stars. “When I was in “The Faces,” we wouldn’t go and break up hotel rooms or go out with tarts to get ourselves in the papers. We broke up hotel rooms and went out with tarts because we bloody felt like it,” he says.

Rod, on re-marrying:

“Instead of getting married again, I’m going to find a woman I don’t like and just give her a house.”

Rod, on looking young:

“The secret is to moisturize the face, I’ve been doing that since I was 17 years old.”

Rod, on songwriting:

“I wrote some of my best love songs ever when I was unhappy and my saddest love songs when I was very much in love.
When I wrote You’re in My Heart, which is an uplifting song, I had just broken up with…Now who had I broken up with?”

Who thought this one up?

“The singer Rod Stewart” is an anagram for “shattered songwriter.”

Britt Ekland’s revelations:

“He (Rod) very often chose to wear my cotton panties on stage. He used to take my knickers and pull them up real tight and stick the teeny-weeny part up his bum, so all that was covered were the parts he wanted covered.”

She said of Rod’s scoliosis condition, “The one advantage of his curvature was that his rear end protruded, and no one wiggled it quite like Rod.”

Michael Jackson’s baby.

Shortly after the incident when Michael Jackson dangled his baby from his hotel window, Rod’s record company got an e-mail from Rod’s manager. It read, “Kindly find new hotel. Cannot risk Rod being struck on head by falling baby.”

Trivia question.

Q. Who is in the Guinness Book of World Records for holding a free outdoor concert for the most people?
A. Rod Stewart. One New Year’s Eve, 1994, Rod performed in front of an estimated crowd of 3.5 million people on Copacabana Beach in Rio de Janeiro.

He’s human after all.

Rod, who is a few years past 60, has said that he can’t manage sex as often as he used to. He said “It’s quality now, not quantity. Kissing is very important.” He added however, that he still counts sex as one of his favorite past-times.

Cancer

Despite the fact that Rod works out and is in good physical shape, about 3 years ago he was diagnosed with thyroid cancer. He said, “It was a terrible shock. I mean I just went into total silence for a few days."

The fact that it was detected early made a big difference. He underwent surgery almost immediately and fortunately has made a full recovery.

Rod said he realizes now that cancer can hit anyone at any time. “I’m one of the lucky ones. I thank God. He must have given me a second chance and there’s something I have to do with the rest of my life”

Finding a purpose.

Faced with such a frightening ordeal, Rod has asked “How can I help?” He wants to do what he can for others in similar situations. He has helped raise money and publicize the City of Hope Foundation’s efforts to find a cure for all types of cancer and has become a spokesman for them.

For a long time Rod has enjoyed a glamorous lifestyle. He has been seen at the best parties and dated and wed some of the world’s most beautiful women.
He now realizes that he can make a significant difference.

What a life. What a Life. Funny, how it works. <<
*Brief Rock History

Rod joined Jimmy Powell and the Five Dimensions (1963) as a singer and blues harp player. In 1964, (for you trivia aficionados) he played blues harp on Millie Small’s big hit record, My Boy Lollipop.

In that same year, Rod joined The Hoochie Coochie Men (which evolved into Steampacket 1964-65), whose claim to fame was supporting The Rolling Stones in 1965.

During that period, after his appearance in a documentary film on the Mod movement, Rod acquired the nickname, “Rod the Mod.”

When Steampacket broke up in 1966, Rod joined Shotgun Express (1966). Among his band-mates was Mick Fleetwood who would later go on to form Fleetwood Mac.

After Shotgun Express, there was The Jeff Beck Group (1966-1969). The group had two hit albums and toured extensively in the U.S. and Europe.

By the end of 1969, the Jeff Beck Group was history, and Rod joined The Faces (1969- 1975). It was about this time he started his solo career as well.

Rod’s solo career started off big. A two-sided hit, Reason to Believe and Maggie May, made Rod Stewart a household name. Maggie May was named in The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame’s 500 Songs that Shaped Rock and Roll. <<

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Golf can be fun

Yes, golf can be fun.

If the ball doesn’t bop you on the head. Or, an airborne putter doesn’t become an attack missal. Or, your swing doesn’t hit the ground instead of the ball.

Golf injury joke

A couple of women were playing golf one sunny Saturday morning. The first of the twosome teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole.

Indeed, the ball hit one of the men, and he immediately clasped his hands together at his crotch, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in evident agony.

The woman rushed down to the man and immediately began to apologize. She explained that she was a physical therapist: "Please allow me to help. I'm a physical therapist and I know I could relieve your pain if you'd allow me!” she told him earnestly.

"Ummph, oooh, nnooo, I'll be alright...I'll be fine in a few minutes", he replied breathlessly as he remained in the fetal position still clasping his hands together at his crotch.

But she persisted, and finally he allowed her to help him. She gently took his hands away and placed them by his sides. She then loosened his pants, and put her hands inside. She began to massage him. She then asked him: "How does that feel?"

To which he replied: "It feels great, but my thumb still hurts like hell."

Golf injury no joke

In the last few years, an alarming amount of reported golf injuries seems to have made golf and football rivals for the title of ‘most injuries while having fun’ sport.

The problem for many amateur golfers is that they play so lousy. (Not you, of course). Let’s face it, for the most part, (You see them on the course all the time.) their technique stinks.

Watch your back

Figure it out. The worse you are, the more strokes you take. Your poor aching back is in perfect position to incur the brunt, causing stress and strain. The back does not know the difference between putting and driving. All it knows is that it is being overused.

For older amateur male golfers the most common injured area is the lower back. As a man ages he may find that lower back pain and an afternoon of practicing putting, unfortunately, seem to go hand in hand. Continually bending at the waist after sitting around all morning can take its toll.

Tennis elbow

Alright, golf elbow. Same thing. The most commonly injured area of the body in older female amateurs is the elbow because of decreased strength in the forearm muscles. Those muscles help with rotation of golf club through the impact area and also with shock absorption from hitting the ground instead of the ball (as previously mentioned). Often, golf elbow can become a chronic condition.

Aging swingers

A commonly injured area in the older player is the shoulder. That is due to decreased strength, flexibility, and also, degenerative changes of the joint. The rotator cuff ages and frays making it a candidate for arthritis.

In places like Florida, joint replacement has become a common surgery -- not just for walking or merely using your limbs like in the “old days.” Now, from the shoulders to the hips to the knees, as we age, apparently we want to continue to play golf.

Head trip

The parts of the head that are the most vulnerable to injury are the sides – the temporal areas.

Some head injuries occur when people stand too close to your swing and get hit with your club. Your adorable grandchildren playing with your clubs is also something to watch out for. And then, of course is the old ball bop on the head (as previously mentioned). The word “fore” should never be whispered.

A word of caution:

If a head injury occurs, never, and I mean never, head for that 19 th hole. The clubhouse for a couple of drinks sure sounds inviting but beware -- alcohol with a head injury can be deadly.

Now for the fun part

Golf is a wonderful sport and a great way to spend an afternoon. It’s also a pretty good way of staying in shape –especially if you walk the course while playing.

Some claim an injury now and then is par for the course. (Ooooh, did I say that?)

However, with some knowledge and preparation you can greatly reduce an injury’s impact or avoid it altogether.

6 ways to help prevent golf Injuries:
1. Warm up your muscles

Before you start playing warm up your muscles with some good stretching exercises. Your back, shoulders and arm muscles especially need to loosen up and warm up before you take your first swing. Stretching after the game can help prevent soreness and muscle fatigue.

2. Become flexible

Flexibility is probably the most important and also overlooked area of the golf game. As the body ages, it loses flexibility and with that loss of flexibility, the range of motion available to the golf swing becomes more restricted.

Achieving proper flexibility in the golf specific muscles allows you to swing more relaxed, therefore decreasing the chance of muscle strains and tears.

It is essential for the older athlete, competitive or recreational, to combat traditional declining flexibility with age. Normal flexibility and efficient joint motion are needed for warm-up activities prior to exercise, and to execute movements required in the respective activity.

3. Strengthen your muscles

Strengthening the muscles that are specific to the swing will help reduce the likelihood of injury as well as improve your overall game.

You don't need bulging muscles to hit a long drive, but strength training is important for overall fitness and prevention of injury. A program of strength training to increase stability in your lower back, abdomen, hips and shoulders is recommended by experts.

4. Refine your technique

If you find you often have one group of muscles that always are sore after the game, you may need to refine your golf swing. A professional can analyze your swing and give you suggestions on improving your technique to prevent injury. You might even find it improves your score.

5. Check your equipment

Be sure your clubs are in good shape and are the correct length and weight for you. Wear properly fitting shoes with socks to prevent blisters when walking. Wear clothing that is appropriate for the weather to prevent heat (or cold) related injuries. Wear a hat, sunscreen and sunglasses to prevent sun damage.

6. Treat injuries as soon as possible

If you do strain or injure yourself during the game or just find that your muscles are aching, apply ice to the area, follow first aid guidelines and use rest, elevation and compression of the area to aid healing of injured tissue.

As the commercials say, “If pain persists, see your doctor.”

Great golf quotes

The reason the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can't see him laughing. --Phyllis Diller

Golf is a lot of walking, broken up by disappointment and bad arithmetic. --Author Unknown

If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they'd starve to death. --Sam Snead

Golf combines two favorite American pastimes: taking long walks and hitting things with a stick. --P.J. O'Rourke

If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt. --Dean Martin

I know I am getting better at golf because I'm hitting fewer spectators. --Gerald Ford

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Don Johnson: Oh, The Stories We Could Tell

On Women, “Monstering,” Tabloids, His Body, a little Philosophy, His Belief System and If not an Actor, then what?

Don Johnson was born December 15, 1949 on a farm in Flat Creek Missouri. He grew up pretty fast.

Women

Rumor has it that Don, at the age 12 seduced his babysitter, at 16 moved in with a woman who was 25 years old and that during his college days seduced his female drama teacher.

Clearly, Don has lived his life in the fast lane. He has been called the Warren Beatty of the '90s.

His name has been linked with many famous women -- Barbara Streisand, Oprah Winfrey, and Cindy Crawford, to name but a few.

His lips are sealed

Don said, “In all of the years in my relationships with a number of women, I have never spoken an ill word about any woman or any person, and I'm not starting now.”

He met Melanie Griffith when she was 14 and he was 22, and they later married for six months, got divorced, then remarried years later, and stayed together about six years.

“Monstering”

[Don and his buddy Glenn would refer to “gettin’ down and partyin’ real good,” as "monstering.” He said, "Your face changes after you’ve been up for two or three days and it gets all contorted and stuff when you’re trying to speak”]

Don tells of a profound thing that happened to him when he returned home after a weekend of some serious “monstering.” His son (who was 10 months at the time) was sitting at the breakfast table and his mother was feeding him. Don described what happened: “I walked in—and of course, he looked up and saw Daddy’s face all monstered out. And I recognized the look in his eye and I said, "Okay, that’s it. Boom. Done. Next!”

Not long after, a Hollywood magazine ran Don’s picture on the cover and it read, ”Don Johnson: Making Sobriety Sexy".

Don’s body

Some years ago, when asked about some nude scenes he had done, Don said, “I'm an exhibitionist on some levels. I'm very proud of my body. I'm pleased with the way I carry myself. I feel that it's all there to be used—the looks and everything. Some people have great minds, and they were given them for a reason. I've never been accused of having that great a mind, but I do have my looks, and I think that they should be used—see what I mean?”

Tabloid talk

“I believe that everyone is entitled to privacy on some level, even a public person. And I think that we have overstepped our boundaries into their bedrooms, into their living rooms, into their bathrooms, into places that we do not belong.”

“I made up my mind a long time ago to live by a really simple code: What other people think of me is none of my business -- only what I think of myself, and only how I feel about what I'm doing. I don't usually read any of the things that are written or said about me.”

A little philosophy

“I think that if you don't have a sense of humor in life, you've pretty much lost about half of the experience, if not more than that. I'm certainly not trivializing anybody's pain, and certainly not my own, but I don't necessarily think that you need to dwell on it.”

Don has said that he does just about everything he wants to do, but does it in moderation. He believes that anything you do in excess is bad for you. “Anything!,” he emphasized.

He admits to having a very, blessed life. “The Chinese have a saying: ‘May you live in interesting times.’ That’s one of the greatest betrothals of good fortune that the Chinese would give you. And if that's the case, then I have had an abundance of interesting times (laughs).”

A belief system

Don thinks that if you believe in what you're doing, and if you totally commit to it, there isn’t anybody that can put you down.

“I can more or less accept everybody's trip,” he has said, “the lowest junkie—I can understand his trip, not because I'm a junkie, which I'm not, but because I can relate it to other things that I am a junkie for. I can understand that need—that desire for something.

I feel that I'm a super-complicated being. I mean, I live a very simple life, but complicated in that I feel a lot of different things all the time. I just accept the fact that I have certain emotions that even I don't understand. But they're mine. I was endowed with them.

If he wasn’t an actor…

Don has said that if he didn’t make it as an actor, he’d probably be in jail by now. He claims that he is not qualified for anything else. “i would imagine that I’d either be doing something larcenous or I would have already been caught. (Laughs again)”

“I'm not really an actor’s actor. I do it because it's the only thing where I really do Grade-A, thoroughbred stuff without really feeling like I'm working at it, and I hate to work.”

“Maybe tomorrow,” he says, “I'll find out that this isn't really what I want after all, and I'll just split into the mountains somewhere and spend the rest of my life playing my guitar. I'll just go away and get into a whole different lifestyle.”

“You know, I've always thought that I'd like to go back and live on a farm, and raise my own food, and just shut out everything else in the world.”


For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit http://www.letlifein.com/. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Online Dating: Pros and Cons for those 50+

There are about 1,000 dating web sites. Probably, more than that. Online dating makes up 1% of all Internet usage. That means that one out of every 100 people logging on visits an online dating site.

Many of us who are 50+ find that being part of the online dating process -- getting out there and doing something for ourselves -- is positive and empowering whether or not the matches are successful.

In any event, like everything else in life, it has its pros and cons. Here are the ones most frequently mentioned:

Pros

1. There are a lot of people out there to choose from.
Remember high school? Remember college? Remember all those girls and guys there and the tremendous number of possibilities? Well, not since then will you find that many potential dates (and mates) in one place.

It’s also comforting to know that you are not alone—that there are many single people your age out there who are looking for the same things you are. Companionship and perhaps love.

A word of advice: Meet as many people as you can. A mistake many 50+ people make is thinking that meeting two or three people in a month, all of whom they don't like, is a good reason to stop. There is someone out there. Don’t give up.

The mainstream sites allow you to search for singles in specific age ranges and geographic locations, but there are also plenty of sites catering to singles who share an ethnic background, a hobby or a sports interest.

2. It won’t cost you an arm and a leg to participate.
Look at it this way –it’s cheaper than going on a senior cruise to (maybe) meet someone. Also, drinks at a singles bar aren’t cheap. Besides if you are past 50, it’s not as easy to “hang out” like you perhaps did in your younger days.

Although you can find free chat rooms and sites that run personal ads, you are probably better off paying a small fee to a legitimate online dating site to meet people who are more serious about meeting you. Most sites have a sign-up fee of about $25 to $50 as well as a monthly fee.

3. Personal Profiles can say a lot.
Most sites require you to write a personal profile. If written with thought, profiles are an excellent way to describe what a potential date is like. Include hobbies, movies, political beliefs, dreams, goals and favorite activities.

Spend time thinking about what you think someone else would like to read about you. Try to make it fun, funny, wry, whatever you think reflects your personality. Then bounce it off a few friends- ideally of the same gender that you hope to attract - to read through it critically and help you identify what's sounds cool and what sounds corny.

Profiles are most often what makes one decide if there is enough in common to make a connection.

Something to note: If you read a profile that someone has posted that is short and it seems apparent that the person writing it put no thought into it, you can expect that kind of communication in real life.

4. It’s easy to connect with someone without feeling awkward.
Say goodbye to the awkwardness that usually occurs on first dates. By exchanging email you get to know each other slowly and relaxed. If you decide to meet, you’ll already know a lot about each other, and that will help you both feel more comfortable.

Con

1. Free is not always good. Beware, there are some strange people out there.
Some sites allow people to post their profiles and respond to others for free. Unfortunately these free sites often attract some strange people. It’s important to check out the site carefully before you join.

For example, here’s one reader’s experience: “One guy resembled the Incredible Hulk while another said he preferred educated women who would spend their lives serving him. Then there was this fellow who ordered one steak to split while dining at a fancy restaurant. He then informed me that sex was expected at the end of the night because an erectile dysfunction drug had been ingested.”
---Name withheld

2. It may cost more than you think.
Many sites will allow you to view other people’s profiles before joining so you get an idea of who’s available. But some may charge to let you reply to a profile, and here’s where you need to be careful.

Check out the membership dues and rules before you join, especially if you provide a credit card number. Make sure you know exactly how much it will cost, when you’re signing up for an automatic renewal that will be charged to your credit card, and what you will need to do to quit the site when you’re ready.

3. Pictures sometimes aren’t honest.
Photos are often an important component of online profiles. Unfortunately, some people post photos that were taken many years ago, when they looked much younger. Often the photos are extremely flattering and not very true-to-life.

Here’s a good rule of thumb: If you remember that he or she probably won’t look as good as his or her photo, you won’t be disappointed.

4. People can lie, too.
No, really? I’m afraid so. In an effort to get more responses, or in some cases, to deliberately mislead, some people lie in their profiles. Don’t believe everything you read—if he or she sounds too good to be true, he or she probably is. <<

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Joe Pesci: A Life of Surprises

Has anybody seen Joe Pesci lately?
He's around but believe it or not, he hasn't made a movie in over 5 years.

Here's the scoop!

Joe has recently said," I've given my whole life to show business. I'd like to find out about another part of life, a more relaxing and spiritual part and a more enjoyable part."

Martin Scorsese: A Spiritual Leader

Joe, speaking of Scorsese has said, "In my eyes, he is a great spiritual leader. Even though many people think that Martin, Bob (DeNiro) and I are ambassadors of violence, I can assure you, we detest it as much as everyone else. But, under Martin's watchful and meticulous eyes, he tries to show how terrible and violent life can be. If you never see the evil man can do, you will never long for the goodness."

You should see Martin on the set when he's talking about any subject. He's so inspirational. Sometimes there are actors and crew members sitting on the floor around him like a flock listening to the shepherd. I've never seen film crews more eager to work and please "the Master".

"For me, Martin has awakened my spiritual side to unbelievable heights. We talk for hours about life, death and spirituality. I can't say enough about how much I love and respect him. Honest to God."

Joe's famous scene

Joe has been referred to as consummate character actor. He has appeared in 3 films directed by Scorsese (Raging Bull, Goodfellas
and Casino). He won an Academy award for Goodfellas as probably the all-time menacing crazy mobster. His famous rant is a classic, and is often repeated in bars across the country when guys have had one too many.

I'm funny how?

Here it is. Try it on your friends.

"What do ya mean, funny? Let me understand this cause, I don't know maybe its me, I'm a little f...... up maybe, but I'm funny how? I mean, funny like I'm a clown, I amuse you? I make you laugh........? I'm here to f....'amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?

Joe holds the world's record and dubious distinction of saying the "f" word about 120 times in Goodfellas.

Backtracking

Joe was born February 9, 1943 in Newark, New Jersey. He started his career in radio as a child actor at the age of four. When he was 10, he was a regular on the TV variety show, Star Time Kids.

Little Joe sure can sing

Joe's acting career hit a lull in his teenage years. In his early 20's, however, he began a musical career under the name of Joe Ritchie. He had an LP called, Little Joe Sure Can Sing

Let's twist

I can't picture this either, but, remember Joey Dee and the Starliters of Peppermint Lounge fame? Joe was their guitar player.

Not counting Let's Twist, a 1961 film he appeared in, Joe made only film, The Death Collector, in 1975. It went virtually unnoticed and Joe decided to give up his acting career, what there was of it.

He returned to New York and ran an Italian restaurant.

"I couldn't get any jobs, and when that happens you get so humble its disgusting. I didn't feel like a man anymore........ I felt really creepy. I was bumping into walls saying, 'Excuse Me'."

"My daughter is the one really great thing that came out of my early life. I'm a good father now. I wish I'd been a good one back then.

The Death Collector as career move

One of the few people who saw Death Collector, was Robert DeNiro. He was impressed by Pesci's performance and brought the film to the attention of Scorsese.

Scorsese cast Pesci as Jake LaMotta's brother in arguably the best film of the Eighties, Raging Bull. The performance earned Pesci an Academy Award nomination as Best Supporting Actor.

The rest, as they say, is history.

Joe has made 24 films. Among them are the 3 Scorsese films mentioned above, Lethal Weapon 1, 2, 3 and 4, Home Alone 1 and 2, My Cousin Vinny, JFK, and Once Upon a Time in America.
To purchase Joe's movies, click here.

Filmography:

Lethal Weapon 4 (1998)
Gone Fishin (1997)
8 Heads in a Duffel Bag (1996)
Casino (1995)
Jimmy Hollywood (1994)
With Honors (1994)
Home Alone 2: Lost in New York (1992)
Lethal Weapon 3 (1992)
My Cousin Vinny (1992)
The Public Eye (1992)
Ruby's Dream (1992)
JFK (1991)
The Super (1991)
Betsy's Wedding ( 1990)
Goodfellas (1990)
Home Alone (1990)
Lethal Weapon 2 (1989)
Man on Fire (1987)
Once Upon a Time in America (1984)
Easy Money (1983)
I'm Dancing as Fast as I Can (1982)
Eureka! (1981)
Raging Bull (1980)
Family Enforcer (aka The Death Collector) (1976)

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.

Aging (and Living) with Friends

"It’s fun having company and just plain smart to pool resources. All we want is to safeguard our quality of life, our independence and our pride.”

Some women are choosing to spend their later years living with their women friends. It could be a sensible alternative to retirement homes.

It’s not sweeping the nation just yet, but the idea is gaining momentum. Sociologists and demographers have noted the growing interest of baby boomer and senior women to team up and face their retirement years together.

The Golden Girls had the right idea.

Heterosexual women who are either single, divorced or widowed are pooling their resources, buying homes together, splitting the chores, buying long term health care insurance --all while enjoying each others friendship and sharing each other’s lives.

A wake-up call.

It is not uncommon for these women to have witnessed their own aging parents having to be dependent on children or paid caregivers.

In many ways it has been a “wake-up” call for them.

(In 1940, only 13% of people over 60 had a living parent. In 2000, 44% did.)

They say this is not the kind of life they want for their later years. The friends-helping-friends living arrangement could very well the answer.

Planning ahead.

Women on the average live seven years longer than men. Although thinking about it is not what they’d like, many women expect to be widows. Planning ahead is not a bad idea.

So what else is new?

Women have had experiences with living in sorority houses and college dorms. They have shared apartments after graduation and have traveled together. Many have been there for each other during divorces, deaths of parents and family emergencies. The closeness is there. There doesn’t seem to be anything unusual about the taking the logical next step.

Health related issues.

Besides the companionship, the reason most mentioned is to be there for each other for health related issues. Taking care of each other during illnesses, not to mention everyday aches and pains is a very compelling reason to consider this kind of living arrangement.

Is it the same for men?

For the most part men in this age group expect that their wives will take care of them should they get ill. Most men over 60 are not used to the caregiver role themselves. One woman voiced what others were thinking. “My husband wasn’t there to change the children’s diapers. It’s hard to imagine him having to take care of me.”

Many women say they would sooner trust their friends to be good caretakers.

Make-it-up as you go along.

Since this phenomenon is relatively new there doesn’t seem to be a right way or a wrong way of going about it. It’s kind of ‘make-it-up as you go along.’ Some have considered an arrangement similar to a pre-nuptial agreement that would make clear rights and responsibilities.

Things to consider.

And then there are inheritance issues to be considered.

There are many legalities that have to be worked out so that it doesn’t become sticky later on.

If they buy a house together, contractual matters need to be discussed and made clear.

Health-wise, it’s easy to say they will take care of each other during flu season but what about severe Alzheimer’s?

New territory.

No doubt about it, we are exploring new territory. But as we all know, things are changing rapidly and we all must consider what “family” really means today. We can’t be stuck in our parent’s way of looking at things. We have to be open to new ideas. Some aren’t as radical as one might think.

As one woman put it, “Let’s face it. It’s fun having company and just plain smart to pool resources. All we want is to safeguard our quality of life, our independence and our pride.” <<

For other articles of interest to those over 50 (seniors and boomers) visit www.LetLifeIn.com. With a cutting edge and a (sometimes irreverent) sense of humor, LetLifeIn.com explores all aspects of being 50+ -- the concerns, the issues, and the controversies as well as the fun stuff.